Betrayal, pain and love
by crazydepths
Summary: What would you think if a person that's really important to you betrays you? Would you be hurt, angry or just disappointed? This story is about the break-up of the shield and all the emotions (I'm imagining) that took place. Why did Seth leave? How can Roman keep his family together? And what is up with Dean? Is there more to the pain in his eyes then just the betrayal of
1. Chapter 1 A Riddle called Dean Ambrose

**I am back! thanks to a friend. I need new internet.**

 **Disclaimer: I don't own anything or anyone except my imagination. All stories are for fun. I like to share them.**

 **Summary: What would you think if a person that's really important to you betrays you? Would you be hurt, angry or just disappointed? This story is about the break-up of the shield and all the emotions (I'm imagining) that took place. Why did Seth leave? How can Roman keep his family together? And what is up with Dean? Is there more to the pain in his eyes then just the betrayal of his little brother? Read and find out.**

 **Rated T for language, violence and same-sex relationship. Light sexual activities later on.**

 **I hope you'll enjoy my little story. Here are the first two chapters. Just let me know how I did.**

 _ **Betrayal, pain and love**_

 **Chapter 1 "A Riddle called Dean Ambrose" **

Seth stared at the script for the new storyline. He couldn't believe what he read.

'WTF! Are they nuts? What is the purpose of that? No way, I am going to do that. I caused enough damage!' He thought to himself and was on his way out so he could talk to Stephanie.

He walked down the hallways and his mind slipped to the target of the new script and his heart started to ache. As he reached the door of Steph's office he heard voices but he still knocked forcefully on the same one and opened it. Seth was so angry with the climax of the new storyline and so he started talking without checking who else was in her office.

"Steph, what the hell are you thinking? That storyline is insane you can't make me do this! I won't hurt him anymore. I told you that I never meant to hurt him as much as I did. How could you let them write such a story when you knew I would never agree? He is been through enough. More than you will ever know! So would you please explain yourself to me?"

"Seth, and a good day to you too. What is your problem? First of all, I don't owe an explanation to anybody. And second we didn't make this story up by ourselves. The top event in four weeks was his idea. So would you explain to ME, what's bothering you, Seth?" She pointed at a corner of her office. Seth's eyes followed the invisible line that her finger drew. When his eyes reached their destination he was shocked.

He inhaled deeply. "Dean?" That was everything he got out. 'Is this supposed to be a sick joke? Why would Dean suggest a match that could end his career? Why would he want to get his head driven through some cinderblocks? Why? Why? WHY? Would he ever be able to figure out the riddle what he called Dean Ambrose's mind?' All of those burning questions are running through Seth's head. He knew that Dean loves his job more than anything else. Dean always says that he owes pro-wrestling, he probably owed that sport his life. Seth pushed his thoughts away and fought back the tears pooling in his eyes. "You came up with that insane match in four weeks? Do you want to die or something?" Seth asks in a very bitter voice.

Dean was still shocked from Seth's words. He couldn't believe that the other man was still thinking about him. Him and his feelings. Dean couldn't bring himself to forgive Seth that he took on that storyline a few months ago and kept quiet about it. Seth and he had a lot of matches or you might say fights against each other. He had two reasons for it. Dean didn't want to see his other "brother" in pain too often when Roman had to fight Seth. Roman and Seth are still very close. They are working out together, watching football at Seth's house and calling each other to see how they've been doing. So he stood up for them as Steph asks a little after the break up who will be the one holding the grudge against Seth and fight him more often than the other. Rome had thanked him for that over and over and over. And the other reason was that he was broken. Broken in every imaginable way . . . physically, mentally and emotionally. He was done… done with thinking, done with hoping and done with hurting. He wanted to bury himself in a dark hole and never come out of there again.

Finally he looked at Seth and said in a cocky voice. "Sounds like fun. Dying … I never tried that!" He crocked an eyebrow and half smiled at the shock in Seth's face. "Steph, would you mind if we sign a contract on the final match in four weeks. I don't want that sly snake to bail out on the main event." Now Seth and Steph, both of them were shocked at his demand. "I won't sue you or anything if something goes wrong. I promise. Neither one of you!" Dean said in a very confidential and serious voice.

He pulled a piece of blank paper from Stephanie's printer. He wrote a brief note about the following four weeks. Then he showed it to Stephanie for her approval. She nodded and signed the paper. She also put an official seal of the WWE on the head of the paper and in the middle of the back. She handed it back to Dean. Stephanie's eyes wandered from him to Seth. She wanted to get up and pull the two-tuned man in a tight hug. She turned to Dean again and spoke with a shaky voice. "You're still damn sure about the end of this fight and I still don't like it. Dean, please tell me what I have to do to change your mind. Your behavior is irrational and you know it yourself. Dean, that stunt could end your career or even your life. I've been telling you this for weeks." She needed Seth to know that she didn't have anything to do with it and already tried to get Dean to listen to her. Dean started to hit his chest with his bare hand. He rolled his eyes at her and said. "Like I said all those other times . . . I FUCKING don't care." He started to get really pissed. Seth had to sign this paper god damn fast or he would lose it right there. He walked over to Seth and looked him in the eyes for the first time in weeks. It hurts, it hurts so much! Dean thought Seth could see his very soul breaking inside of him. His eyes turned into a determent and scary glare. "You know I don't trust you anymore. But I know you're freaking good at your job. So the only thing I am asking for is that you do the best you've ever done." He handed Seth the paper and said a littler calmer than before but with a hint of despair in his voice. "Let's make it like you've always wanted. Big! Dramatic! Breathtaking and heart stopping! Followed by a 'WTF'!" Steph inhaled deeply.

Now it was Seth's turn to wonder about the man looking at him with that frozen eyes. Dean still knew that. He'd told Dean that he wanted an epic fight over three years ago. Seth took a deep breath and fought the urge of shoving Dean back against the wall to knock some sense into him. "Dean…!" He was cut off by those frozen eyes that didn't suit Dean at all. He missed the caring, warm eyes from him. He knew it was his fault. All of it! Everything! But he would never admit that to his brothers. At least not yet. Dean whispered into Seth's ear after he moved slowly closer. "Just sign the paper and do your job." Seth knew Dean too well so he obeyed. He took the paper and signed without taking his eyes of Dean who exhaled loudly as he saw the younger man signing. Dean mumbled a quiet thanks and walked out of Steph's office. "I'm so sorry, Seth. I tried my best to get him to listen to me but . . ." She didn't know how to finish the sentence. "It's not your fault, Steph. Don't blame yourself. I need to talk to him though. Maybe I can get through to him." Seth turned around and ran after Dean.

He caught up with him just before he would walk into the cafeteria. Seth grabbed his shoulder and said. "Dean, I need to talk to you. Now! Roof or basement? Your choice." Dean looked at his so called brother and answered. "Roof, so I can practice dying for crying out loud." Seth looked in his eyes and couldn't hide the fact that he was hurt by this answer.

Roman who was waiting for Dean caught the whole incident. He didn't know what was going on but he thought it would be best if he followed. Although he gave them space to talk in private. He just wanted to make sure they wouldn't fight on the roof. Dean's saying about dying wasn't new to him. After the whole mess that Seth left them in, Dean was broken and hurt beyond words. Roman would call or text him every single day just to know if Dean was still breathing. Roman didn't know how to help his brother except being there for him. He promised himself he would see Dean's infectious smile again! No matter what! Roman had tried so hard to get his two baby brothers to talk to each other but nothing worked. After Dean told him why he couldn't bring himself to see Seth's actions only as business act he stopped pushing the issue. Roman kept his distance but followed his brothers up the stairs to the rooftop. Dean leaned on the wall right next to the door and Seth walked a couple more steps to the center of the roof so he could feel the wind. Dean glared at that beautiful man for a moment. He missed being with both of his brothers. His family. Yeah family, because his own family was too messed up to mean anything to him. But he wasn't here to dream about some 'what if's'. So he puts a foot on the wall which he was leaning against and asks in a cold voice. "What do you want, Rollins? I ain't got all day. You wanted to talk, so talk already!"

"Would you fucking tell me what is wrong with you? What riddle is stuck in your mind now and how can I figure it out? You can't be serious. This stunt is some dangerous shit and I don't want to hurt you or even be the reason for the end of your career. So tell me, what I need to do to stop you?" Seth couldn't hold back all of his tears but he still looked in Dean's eyes. That simple act calmed Dean down and his eyes were so clear. Seth was so worried about one of his best friends. Even if Dean didn't feel the same way anymore but he still cared for him. He actually cared very deeply about the lunatic. "Dean, please! Please, let me change your mind." Roman got his hopes up for a brief moment. Maybe Seth could smash some sense into the difficult mind of Dean Ambrose.

 **I hope you enjoyed the first chapter. Let me tell you, it will get worse and than worst . . . after that it gets better.**

 **Sorry for wrong punction, I am not a native speaker. I still know it's a lame excuse.**

 **Hugs to all of you.**


	2. Chapter 2 Choices and Consequences

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything or anyone except my imagination. All stories are for fun. I like to share them.**

 **Rated T for language, violence and same-sex relationship. Light sexual activities later on.**

 **I hope you'll enjoy my little story. Here are the first two chapters. Just let me know how I did.**

 _ **Betrayal, pain and love**_

 **Chapter 2 "Choices and Consequences"**

Dean looked into Seth's eyes and wanted nothing more than to believe that he still cared. But he knew that life never treated him kind so he just couldn't. He's been through enough. His crappy childhood, the years when he started working, the wrong turns he took and now this whole chaos with Seth. No way, he could let himself be the one who got hurt again. Dean didn't know if he was able to hide his true feelings but he knew he had to try. He slides down the wall in a seated position and told Seth with an emotionless and cold voice. "You don't want to hurt me. What could you do to change my mind? Hmmm! Let me see? How about turn back the time? To the day when we met. And remind me that I shouldn't talk to you so we never become friends. Can you do that for me, Thie?" All the bitterness in his voice was almost too much to bear for both of them. Calling Seth by his nickname was hurting so badly. Dean thought his heart was torn from his chest. Seth was shaking in pain as he heard the nickname Dean always used for him in the good old times.

This sentence brought Roman back to reality and that little spark of hope he had was gone. 'Damn it, how could I help my brothers? Both of them.' Because he knew they were both in pain. Up till now he had no clue. "Dean, please. I get that you're still pissed even if I don't know why. But you got to listen to me and cut your show I can see right through it. This crap you're talking here is nothing but bullshit. If you have to lie then think of something more believable. I am sorry for…" No matter how hard Seth tried Dean could see that he was hurt by his harsh words. His soul shattered again and again to see him like this. It was even worse because he knew he was the one who caused that pain in Seth's eyes. But he had to play his part further. "You're sorry? Seth, you know the most shit in my so called life. I trusted you like I never trusted anyone before. And all you did was ripping out my heart and shove it down my own throat. Just to show me that I shouldn't expect something good in life." He smashed his head into the wall behind him with every word he spoke. "Dean that is not true. You didn't want to talk to me anymore. Don't put this all on me. And stop that!" Seth took a step towards Dean but when he saw his eyes he froze in his movement. "You are telling me I shouldn't blame you? I can't believe you. Seth, you wanted more and more. I wouldn't have stopped you if you wanted to go and play the 'big dog' in the business if you would have talked to us. Neither would have Rome and you know that. I knew you can be self-centered but this was too much. Do you have any idea how much pain and doubts you brought to me and especially to Rome? He thinks he has to proof to me that I can count on him. He feels guilty about hanging out with you and the knowledge that it hurts me. He is sitting in the middle of this whole mess we are in. Stop making this all about you. There are other people that are affected by your actions and don't try to talk your way out of it. You brought this upon us. You might be hurting too even if I doubt that." Dean couldn't control his temper anymore even if he was talking in an icy static voice. He still smashed his head into the wall behind him. His hands were clinched into fists so hard that his knuckles turned white. He got up from his seated position still smashing his head into the hard, cold wall behind him. He wanted to throw some punches.

All of a sudden he felt a large hand between his head and the wall and a strong arm across his chest. "Dean, shh, calm down. I know you don't want to hurt him and please stop hitting your head." Roman's deep and calm voice went straight to Dean's head. He stopped immediately. He looked in Rome's eyes and asked in a low voice. "How long are you here? Did you hear what we were talking about?" He saw in the taller man's face that he was moved by the words he heard a couple minutes ago. Roman didn't mean to spy on his brothers but their voices increased with each spoken word. Dean had to fight the emotions within him. Anger. Hurt. Pain. Resignation. Rage. Roman pulled him closer to give his brother some comfort and petted his head carefully. He turned around to look at Seth who was shocked to see Dean in Roman's arms as he tried to calm down. Roman smiled weakly at Seth and said in a friendly voice. "It is better if you leave now. I will see you tomorrow around 10 am at the gym. I think it's better if you give Dean his space now. I don't know exactly why you two were arguing but I have to make sure this is not getting out of hands. So, bye Seth. See you tomorrow." The tall Samoan turned back to look at Dean and told him soothing words. "How are you feeling, Dee? Do you think I can let go of you, without you're doing something stupid? If you are ready I will take you home, okay?" Dean nodded carefully and said. "Rome, you can let go of me. But let me smoke a cigarette before I come down to the parking lot. Would you mind getting my duffle bag from the locker room? I will smoke and meet you at your car. I need a moment to breath." Dean spoke very quietly because his throat was very dry. He was shaken by all of his emotions. He looked to Roman for his friend's approval. Roman nodded. "No trouble at all, bro. Take your time. I will wait at the car."

Then Dean looked over to see Seth staring at him. It hurts him to see his former best friend so confused. "Seth … uh, it's okay … just go. I know we can do it. You have one more dream come true and I have my peace. Give me at least this much credit. I know this stunt is crazy but you should know me by now." Dean told Seth those words even though he wasn't sure if they were true. Seth looked at Dean and nodded. "Dean, are you sure? Do you think we can pull this stunt off?" He spit out his concerns. The other man pulled out a package of cigarettes and nodded. "Just leave me alone for a while. See you Thursday." He said it without looking at Seth as he lit his cigarette. Roman pulled on Seth's arm and said. "Come on, we're leaving. Like he said, give him some credit. He is the one of us who had the craziest matches. And you know it. We've seen some shit of Dean's hardcore and death matches. Let's go. Meet you at the car, Dean."

After the two long-haired men left Dean closed his eyes and let go of a few silent tears. Why was his life so fucked up? All he wanted was to believe Roman and Seth. He had no one left he could trust. He was tired and confused and broken. His heart was broken by the first person he truly loved and this certain someone had betrayed him. He really needed a break so bad. He pulled out a second cigarette after he stomped out the first one. He hadn't told even Rome what else was going on in his life. He didn't know why this shit was affecting him so much. He looked up to the sky one last time and then he left the rooftop to meet Rome at his car.

When Dean arrived at the parking lot he saw that Roman was sitting in his car and talking on the phone. He knocked carefully on the side window of the passenger seat. Roman looked to his right and signified Dean to hop in. "Okay honey. Yes, I will pick up some milk on my way home. And I will ask Dean. Don't treat me like a kid. I am your husband for crying out loud. Ha, ha … that is true. Love you, Lis. See you in a bit." Roman closed his cell and looked at Dean. "Family, man. I hope you don't mind stopping at the Giant. Lisa wants me to pick up some milk. Oh, and I'm supposed to ask you if you would like to join us for dinner. Lisa and Leila would love to see you again." Dean smiled at his friend and said with some pain in his voice. "Hey Rome, first hold close the ones you love and don't take them for granted. Second, I don't mind stopping to get some milk. I actually need some soda. And third, as much as I admire your wife and love your daughter, I don't think I'm a suitable company today. Please tell Lisa, I am sorry. I will make it up to her. Just bring me home after we got the milk and the soda." The young man's eyes were filled with pain and his brother was confused by his words.

"Dean, what's up with you? Such words of wisdom from you." Roman couldn't believe those words that came out of Dean's mouth. He felt that there was more to Dean's pain then just the mess with Seth and his feelings for the other man. Dean closed his eyes and answered in a pretend cocky voice. "Maybe I have a clear moment every once in a while." He grinned at Roman and petted the shoulder of his friend. "Dean, drop this attitude. You know I am your friend if there is something you want to talk about I am here for you." Roman looked worried in the blue eyes of his friend. Dean smiled weakly and nodded so Roman started the car. They got the milk and the soda at the Giant. And then Roman brought Dean to his home. "Thanks Rome, you're the best. I wish you a good work out tomorrow and say greetings to Lisa and Leila. Take care, man. See you Thursday." Dean gave Roman a hug and climbed out of the car with the soda in his hand and his duffle over the shoulder.

"Dean? Are you sure you want to pull off that stunt? Do you think you're up to it? Don't get me wrong. I know it's nothing compared to the shit you did a couple years back. But I can feel that there is more going on in your head, then what you are telling me. So please, let me help you! I am your friend and I'll be there for you. You don't have to go through this all by yourself. And don't you worry about me so much. Of course I don't like it that you and Seth are still not over the whole mess and I have to share my spare time between you and him. But you should know that I wouldn't keep up with that bullshit if I wouldn't be sure you two are my very best friends."

 **Thanks for reading! Let me know how you like it so far.**

 **Hugs to you all!**


	3. Chapter 3 Apologies and worries

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything or anyone except my imagination. All stories are for fun. I like to share them.**

 **Today I want to give you the next few chapters of my story. I hope you had nice Easter and some nice hours with friends or/and family. You will get a treat today. The story somehow turned into my baby. And I can't tell you how long it is going to be. I hope you stick with Seth, Dean and Roman till the end.**

 **Rated T for language, violence and same-sex relationship. Light sexual activities later on.**

 **I hope you'll enjoy my little story. Here are the next chapter. Just let me know how I did.**

 **Chapter 3 "Apologies and worries"**

Dean couldn't believe that Roman still tried to convince him, that he was his friend. He had to make clear that he didn't doubt that Roman was his friend. So he said in an honest and clear voice. "I know you are my best friend and stop telling me that all the time. I know you will always be there for me. If I just could swallow my damn pride than you wouldn't be in so much pain. I am sorry that we are making you do that. Splitting your rare free time between us, instead of being all together and have as much fun as we used to. Rome, I am really sorry that you have to keep up with my mood swings and that you have to keep quiet about the whole thing. And about the other thing that is going on in my life. I will tell you if I have the urge to get it off my chest. Right now, I have to process the entire situation, okay? I have to thank you for being such a great friend." Roman blushed and waved it off. Dean made him feel even more uneasy. He knew that he always spent more time with Seth than with Dean that was the reason why he felt so guilty. Because it was true that Dean needed him more than Seth. Dean was in so much more pain than his other 'brother'. He wanted everything to be like it used to be. All three of them together. "Okay, Dean. No need to thank me. Take your time and if there is anything I can do for you just let me know. Love you, man. Take care. See you Thursday."

As his beloved 'brother' left the driveway he unlocked the door of his apartment and walked in. He didn't even bother to turn on the lights. He enjoyed the silent darkness. Dean was always calm when it was dark. He pinned it on his childhood and the way his stepfather used to punish him when he was drunk. All of a sudden some very painful memories washed over him. Dean walked in his bedroom and headed towards his closet. He pulled out a box and opened it to grab an old photo album. Hot tears were rolling down his face as he opened it and looked at his favorite pic. The light that came from outside through his window was enough for him to see. He missed that boy that was standing next to him with that big smile on his face and an arm wrapped tight around his waist in that photo. He whispered a silent "I am so sorry." It was almost too quiet to be heard even for himself. He took that album and went into the kitchen to get himself a drink. He didn't like it to drink his sorrows away but today was too much to deal with. The blue-eyed man took a bottle of Gin and a bottle of Tonic out of the fridge and strolled to the couch in the living room. He turned on the little lamp on one of the side tables. The first drink was always the worst for him because everything was so clear. Seth's eyes . . . Roman's honesty . . . the old memories of his best friend from childhood days and the fucking pain over something he thought that it would never affect him so much. He poured the second drink in the glass and skipped through the album. He would wake up with a hell of a hangover because he started to pour only gin in his glass. But he didn't care. Dean wanted to sleep so badly. Just a deep dreamless good night sleep. He kept the drink close and let the pain be drained away.

Next morning around 9.30 am. Roman was talking on the phone to Seth. He wanted to know if he should pick up his 'brother' or meet him at the gym. "You were serious yesterday? You're really want to work out with me?" Seth asked in a little sleepy voice. Roman chuckled. "Are you still in bed, you little brat? Come on, move it, Seth. I will be there in 15 minutes to pick you up and then I'll rip your sleepy ass. I'm going to bench you to hell, Sethie." The challenge was set and Seth was wide awake as he listened to Roman. "You wish you big piece of muscle. I'll bench at least 10 pounds more than you. Don't worry I will be waiting outside for you. See you in a bit." He knew that he wouldn't beat Mr. Powerhouse at the bench and snickered. Seth closed his cell and jumped out of bed. He put on some shorts, a wife beater and the running shoes he always used for the workouts with Roman. He didn't sleep very well after he had heard the words Dean had thrown at him. Why would his action affect Dean or Roman? It was his choice. But when he saw that Roman was moved by Dean's words he was very confused. Something else didn't let him sleep either. Seeing Dean and Rome so close . . . in each other's arms. Why did it hurt so much to see Dean in someone else's arms? He had no fucking right to be jealous. He left so he wouldn't have to be so close to Dean. He didn't want to scare the other man away with his unexpected feelings. He hadn't told anyone yet. It tore his heart apart every time he saw him and the beloved blue eyes. He wanted nothing more than to be with Dean and tell him that he was so sorry for being such a selfish coward.

 _-At the gym.-_

They were still in the middle of their warm up. Seth watched Roman very closely. Something was different today. No cheap comments that he was a slow moving worm that needs to speed up. Or some cocky eyes that told him he would never beat Mr. Powerhouse. Seth mustered up all the courage he could find in him and asked his 'big brother'. "Rome, is it true? Please be honest!" The larger man was pulled away from his thoughts as he heard Seth talking to him. "Roman?" He looked at his 'brother' with questioning eyes. "Sorry Seth. What did you say? I didn't pay attention." Seth took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "I figured that you're not paying attention. Because I tried to ask you a question about three times already. I asked you if it was true. Is it true? Be honest with me, please." Roman turned to look at him and said. "What are you talking about? What's supposed to be true? I don't get it. Did I miss a whole conversation? Seth, right now, you are not making any sense." The younger man started to get angry and smacked his palm onto his forehead. "Rome, seriously I want to know if that what Dean said yesterday is true. He looked so clear in that moment. Like he knew that what he said was the truth. I've never seen him so focused." The young Samoan cough to clear his throat. "It is true. Don't you get . . . why I try to assure him that he can count on me? I feel so fucking guilty that I don't split my free time equally between you two. Even though I know it hurts him. But he would never judge me for spending time with you because to him we are still brothers. It hurts me so much that I always try to make sure he knows I won't turn my back on him. That I am always gonna be there. That I'm not like his parents that just left him. His parents are the reason why he is terrified to be left behind. He is so scared to trust anyone because life never treated him too kind. You know all of that yourself. But Seth, you are still the only person I know who can calm Dean Ambrose down in an instant. I was just lucky yesterday . . . and I used an unfair weapon. Dean is hurting so bad and I don't know how to help him. Did you know that he hasn't smiled over a month now? Man, I want to see his smile again so bad. The mess with you and whatever he is not telling me. It's killing him and seeing him like this, it's killing me! Do you have any idea what you did to all of us and to his already crumbled mind? Just because you left without telling us. Seth, you broke him completely. And I know you're hurting too. You are in pain because you're not honest with yourself and you miss us. I'm sorry but you need to know that even if it hurts you." It wasn't like Roman to talk so much but he needed Seth to know. He needed him to know and to understand how bad it was and how guilty he felt. Roman needed his 'little brother' to understand that he was worried about Dean. "Sometimes I am scared of Dean. His eyes go all crazy and I fucking don't know if he'll jump in front of the next train or if he'll going to slaughter the next dozen people in his way. But other times I am scared for him. Then his blue eyes are so far away that I think he is literally losing his mind and his soul is breaking in thousand pieces right in front of me. And there is nothing . . . nothing I can do about it. Do you have the slightest idea how much this is hurting me because I can't help him? It was always you who could reach the depths of the difficult mind of Dean Ambrose. I feel so guilty and so helpless. That fucking sucks. Tell me, do you feel proud now that I told you I am not as good as you, when it comes down to handle Dean. I will never be as close with him as you were and that is actually your fault. You did the same thing his parents did to him. You abandoned him. You left him behind. You broke his trust and I can't fix him." Roman took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "Sorry Seth, I am being unfair. But it's so hard for me that I am not able to help one of my best friends." Seth was shocked. If it was true what his 'big brother' told him just about now, then it was far worse than he had expected. "You got to be kidding, Rome. You're telling me all of this because you are pissed. Don't you? That Dean isn't smiling anymore has to be a joke. He always smiles. God damn, he could smile his way out of trouble with that adorable dimples." Roman dragged one of his large hands over his face and sighed. "Seth, I never lied in my entire life and I wouldn't start right now. All of it is true. I am sorry for dropping the bomb in such an undiplomatically way. But I'm really worried about him. Something happened to him in the last two weeks. But he doesn't want to talk about it and it's scaring the shit out of me. How can we help him?" Seth stepped off the treadmill and tucked on Romans shirt. "That sounds fucking scary. I am sorry that I didn't see that you are in so much pain, Rome. Really, I am sorry. And I have to admit I didn't think that my decision would cause all of this. It sounds like Dean is trying to fight some sort of major issue. I never meant to cause so much sorrows and doubts for both of you. You have to believe that. I thought we will fight against each other and have fun with it. I become part of the authority and you two would beat the hell out of Orton, Kane and HHH. And eventually I join you again and we screw Hunter over big time. But I was so wrong. I've never been so lonely in my life. Without you two. I miss being with my big brothers. In my mind this was all easy going. We would spend time together on our days off and have fun, watch some games and be there for another. Damn, how could I be so wrong?" Seth covered his eyes with one of his hands and sniffed. Roman pulled him into a tight embrace and told him. "Shh, Sethie! Everything is gonna be okay. We will figure it out. We are the only ones, who are able to help us and to help Dean. Believe that!" Just like any other big brother would do. The bigger man petted his head and Seth remembered the scene from yesterday when Rome did exactly the same thing to Dean. He smiled and he knew that his big brother was right. If they wanted to feel better they have to help themselves and be honest to each other. But Seth was bothered by something else. "Rome, what did you mean with you were lucky and used an unfair weapon to calm him down?" The big men took a deep breath and thought very carefully about his answer. But he would never lie so he said. "You! You were my secret weapon, Seth. I told him that I know that he doesn't want to hurt you. Even if you don't believe me but Dean still cares a lot about you." Seth was shocked. Is this true? "That can't be true, Rome. He is still mad at me. Dean doesn't want us to be friends anymore. He asked me if I can turn back time so we'll never become friends." Seth started to sniff. Roman pulled him back in a tight hug and said. "Sethie, you know that this is not true. You know that he is not mad at you rather than upset and disappointed. Calm down." Roman stroke his back and after a couple minutes he calmed down. He knew that his big brother was right again. When Seth looked up to Roman he saw that he was caught in some serious thoughts again but this time it looked like Rome wanted to share. "Seth? You know Dean best. He said yesterday something to me that caught me off guard and I don't know what to think off it. It was so unlike Dean." The two friends looked into each other's eyes and Seth asked curiously. "What did he say?" The man with the mysterious grey eyes looked into the brown eyes of his friend and started to talk. "It was not just what he said. It was also the way he said it. So sad, so heartbroken. As if he really knows what he's talking about. I'm telling you those words are burnt into my mind and soul forever. I swear, Seth! He said to hold close the ones we love and don't take them for granted. Such words from that freaking adorable nut job. I will never forget the sadness in that blue depths." Seth chocked and needed to hold on to the wall behind him. WTF had happened in Ambrose's life? Why did he ever hurt that man so much? He never meant to cause all of this. And slowly he realized he was indeed the one to blame. He caused both men who he loved like brothers and even more, so much hurt and trouble. They didn't went back to their workout. They just walked back to Roman's car and sat there for a while. It was Seth who broke the silence. "Roman, I'm so sorry. I can see now that I am indeed the one who caused the whole mess. I didn't think that my act would cause such troubles." Roman looked at his little brother and told him in a shaky voice. "You're right but there is nothing you can do to change that anymore. But I hope you know that I am not mad at you. You want to reach your dreams at any costs. Sometimes I envy you. But I could never betray my friends like you did. I would never lie . . . ever. I think that this is the only reason why Dean believes me. He knows I can't and won't lie to anyone no matter if friend or foe." Roman saw that Seth started to shake and put one of his big hands on Seth's shoulder. "I don't want to hurt you but you need to know the truth. Dean is hurting and I am a fucking mess too and you're not being honest with yourself either. So I suggest that you do some serious thinking and call me when you know what you want." The younger man was shocked. "You know that I am hiding something from you. How? Is it that obvious? I'm so confused. I have so many different emotions to deal with. And some of them are scary as hell." The Samoan petted the younger man's head again and said. "You are one of my best friends and I can see that you are hurting and confused. Man, I love you like a brother just the same way I love Dean and I can see that he is in pain too. But I think I can actually help you and maybe when you are done hurting, we could help Dean." After a short silence Roman asked. "Do you want me to bring you home so you can start thinking or do you want to come to my house?" Seth looked at his big brother and said. "Just take me home. You're right I need to think a lot. Thanks Rome, love you too!"

 **So what do you think? Do you think Roman could help his brothers? Or will Dean just break apart completely? And is Seth really just a selfish brat? Go ahead and find out in the next chapter. Thanks for reading.**

 **I hope you enjoyed it as much as I had while I was writing it.**

 **Hugs to all of you. Take care!**


	4. Ch 4 Not the way it's supposed to be!

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything or anyone except my imagination. All stories are for fun. I like to share them.**

 **The fourth chapter awaits you. Just to let you know how my mind works, at least a bit. The pronunciation of the nicknames rhymes of tea. So 'Thie' [Ti:] and 'Dee' [Di:] sound in my head like that. And 'Rome' [rǝʊm] just like the capital city of Italy without the 'a' in the end. I hope I got that diacritical marks right or as we would say "umlaut-spelling". Please bear with me and my crazy imagination. Hope you still like the story. Let me know what you think.**

 **Rated T for language, violence and same-sex relationship. Light sexual activities later on.**

 **I hope you'll enjoy me little story. Here is the next chapter. Just let me know how I did.**

 **Chapter 4 "Not the way it's supposed to be!"**

The days went by and turned into weeks. Roman and Dean would fight together against whoever was up to challenge them. Dean would beat the heck out of Seth whenever he had a chance. When the two-tuned man would walk down the ramp to compete, on his way to the locker room or in the parking lot. It didn't matter. But Seth could feel that there was a difference to all the other times before. Dean wouldn't hit him with all he's got. He'd just put on a great show, every single time. But his eyes. The brown-eyed man was horrified to see that these lovely blue shades were usually far away or pained. What had happened to his best friend? Seth didn't go out to celebrate with his co-workers anymore. He needed to get all the chaos in his head straight. He needed to decide what he wanted. For once he had to think about the consequences. He had to make sure that he wouldn't make it worse for his brothers. But seeing Dean changing into a hollow shell of his own self, hurts him more than he could tell. That Dean wasn't the same who Rome and he met all those years ago. Where did that freaking talented, totally crazy and absolutely adorable nut job go he loved so much? Finally he admitted it! He wasn't scared anymore. At least he could admit it to himself now. Yes, he loved Dean or should he better say he was in love with him and he missed him like crazy. Roman said two weeks ago, he should call him if he figured out what he wanted. But he didn't have the strength to talk to his brother yet. He knew that he loved Dean more than a brother. He still didn't know if he wanted Dean to know that yet. Seth needed a little more time to think it over. The only thing he wanted to do is asking Dean if they could go over that dangerous stunt. So he called Roman one week before the main event which actually scared him more than anything else in his life before. The younger man called Roman because Dean wouldn't answer his calls. "Hey Rome, how are you? It's been a while." The grey-eyed man could hear that Seth didn't call because he finally made up his mind. Therefore Rome felt still too much pain in his little brother's voice. The Samoan didn't want to rush the young man so he said in a friendly voice. "Hey man, long time no see. I am great and how are you?" Seth smiled in his phone because he was sure that his brother knew he wasn't done thinking just from hearing his voice. "I am good, little tired maybe but okay. And I want to thank you for being such a great friend, Rome. You knew I didn't call to tell what's bothering my brain, didn't you? You are really one half of my best friends and the best big brother we could wish for. Love you, man." The larger man snickered. "Love you too, bro. But that is not why you're calling me. Am I right?" Now Seth needed to grin and spoke up in an honest tune. "You are so right. I call you because I need to talk about business to you." Roman pulled up an eyebrow and ask firmly. "Business? With me? How come?" The younger man hesitated and pressed his cell to his ear. "Actually I want to talk to Dean about the stunt. I would like him to explain to me how he wants to pull this off. But he wouldn't pick up his phone when I call him. So I thought you could arrange a meeting between us." He could hear his brother inhaling deeply and trying to swallow his anger. "Is that all you can think about right now? Seriously Seth. Sometimes I don't believe the words that are coming out of your mouth. You didn't even ask me how Dean is doing. Is the business all you really care about? It feels like I don't know you anymore." Now Seth was mad at Rome who never was so unfair and over the edge with him before. "Roman, I'm trying to be responsible here. If I don't know how to pull off that stunt the right way I might kill Dean. And I was going to ask you how he's been but you didn't leave me any chance. Did I catch you in a bad moment or so? If you want I can call you back later." The first couple words he yelled in his phone but he wanted the older man to know that he tried to do the right thing. "Seth sorry. I didn't mean to but you caught me off guard. The whole thing with Dean is getting worse and worse. He isn't smiling, he only talks when he has to, his eyes are so hollow and he stopped eating properly. He scares the shit out of me. And the only thing he keeps saying, is that he wants to sleep. Just sleep the pain away. I don't know if he is really up to compete next week. He is just a walking puppet. I can't take this any longer. But I will talk to him that he needs to tell you how he wants to pull this stunt through." Seth was terrified. Dean . . . Dean played with his own life. And what pain did he want to sleep away? The thoughts in his head were running wild. Roman promised him that he would talk to Dean during their workout today. "I'll call you tonight to let you know if he'd agreed. See you soon, Seth." The young Samoan spoke after a short moment of peace and an audible breath. "One more thing, Seth. Would you please make up your mind, your hesitation might cost Dean's life. You know that no matter what you're my friend and I'll be there for you. But I don't know how long I can stand seeing him like this. Honestly Seth, it's killing me. The pain is so fucking gruesome. I want him back!" The two-tuned man thought for a brief moment and heard his big brother fighting tears. But that couldn't be. It shouldn't be. It must not be that way. "Whom? Rome, who do you want back?" That question cut Roman like a knife. He started to yell. "Ahh, Rollins. I want to punch you in your smooth face so badly right now. I can't believe you. DEAN! I want my brother Dean back. The funny, and chaotic lunatic who I love so much. And maybe when it's not too much to ask then I can have my other little brother back at my side too. The one who is too smart for his own good and always sweet and caring." Maybe what was happening to Dean right now wasn't Seth's fault anymore. But he had part in it because he made him vulnerable. Too vulnerable. "Sorry. I'm so sorry. But I actually refuse to believe that it's as bad as you say, Roman. Nothing can keep that guy down. Even if I have to admit his fighting changed a bit." Seth wasn't ready to let him know, that he was falling apart. All what he had heard was too much. Seth didn't want to know that Dean was hurting so badly because this way he could pretend that it was not too bad. But the emotions of his big brother were real. Much too real. Seth has never ever seen Mr. Powerhouse cry. Now the tall man with the grey eyes snapped. "How can you of all people say that? Don't you dare? Have you seen Dean at all this week? I have. I had to drive to his house last night and make sure he doesn't do anything he would regret. He cried himself to sleep, Seth. I wanted to comfort him but he wouldn't let me. He doesn't want to let anyone close to him anymore." The tall man hung up so quickly and the pretty face was left alone to think again. Seth didn't have a chance to respond. 'How could this be? Now my big brother is mad at me for the betrayal, too. And Dean, he wouldn't even let the grey-eyed caring brother be close to him. What have I done to Dean? How deep is that scare I caused? What pain wanted Dean to sleep away? Could I maybe help Dean to feel better?' The young man with the unique hairstyle closed his phone and started crying. He thought about everything he and his brothers had been through. That made him feel even worse. 'I gave up the 'perfect family' for a selfish plan and for my own goods, to safe my own ass. How can I make it right again? At least in our private lives.' It wasn't like it was supposed to be. Seth wanted his best friends back and he had to tell them and especially Dean why he turned heels on them without a word. He felt his cheeks blushing while he thought of telling the truth. But he needed them to know. He needed them to understand that he didn't have another chance to save all three of them. To get his mind of things, he pulled out his mp3-player and put on some running shoes. He locked the door behind him and ran and ran and ran. The young man knew his big brother would call only around 6 pm. So he had plenty of time. He needed to kill time.

 **So that was chapter number 4. And do you get slowly that I am in some ways just a sick person. Emotionally damaged and kind of lost in my own world but guess what. I f**king don't care. I love my life and my friends even though I still chasing my dreams. I hate people who tell me I need to stop writing because it's useless. They have now f**king clue it's just like a therapy to me just like a good live concert and a great tattoo.**

 **Hope you had fun reading just like I had with writing the latest chapter.**

 **Hugs to you and a big thank you. :-***


	5. Chapter 5 Principles and Truth

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything or anyone except my imagination. All stories are for fun. I like to share them.**

 **So here is a little treat for you . . . because I still can not post on a regular basis. So today you get a fifth chapter. I want to say thanks to all my new followers. You all get an especially tight hug. Thanks for the support. Hug :-***

 **Rated T for language, violence and same-sex relationship. Light sexual activities later on.**

 **I hope you'll enjoy me little story. Here are the fifth chapter. Just let me know how I did.**

 **Chapter 5 "Principles and Truth"**

Roman and Dean met up for their workout at the gym. When the long-haired giant saw his troubled friend coming he had to smile. Dean rode his bike for the first time in weeks and that should be a good sign. "Hey there Dee. You're taking care of the beauty again?" Dean showed his friend a weak smile. "She deserved a 'night out'!" They started the workout and the young Samoan was surprised in what shape Dean seemed to be. "Hey man, slow down! You haven't eaten that much lately. I don't want you to drop right in front of me." The man with the unruly hair looked at his brother. "What do you mean with I haven't eaten that much? I do eat. And just so you know, I had a decent breakfast. Eggs, bacon, toast and a cup of coffee." Roman caught the annoyed tune in his brother's voice. "Dean, I didn't want to offend you. But I saw that you didn't eat very much last week. Don't try to tell me otherwise. How are you by the way?" The slightly younger man knew that he would fail at the attempt to proof his friend wrong about the food topic. And Roman was right he just couldn't eat a lot the past three days. That fucking pain. Why did he even bother? She never was there for him or cared about his feelings. Was there a time when she actually loved him? He couldn't remember. Everything was all blurry. "I am fi . . . I . . . fuck I don't know, Rome. Really I think I'm losing it. All I fucking want to do is sleep. Just sleep. It hurts so fucking bad. The thing I haven't told you yet and HE! Man, I miss him so much. I can't stop thinking about him. Sometimes I can't eat or sleep and it's even hard to breathe. I want him to be close and I want to be able to just let him know why I can't forgive him just like that. Do you think I'm stupid for still loving him so damn much?" Dean was quieted for a moment and after a deep breath he kept going on. "But on the other hand I am so freaking scared to let anyone close to me again. Sorry, Rome. I feel really guilty for yelling at you yesterday when you were trying to comfort me, bro. But I just couldn't stand the fact that you saw me so weak. I don't want to be like that anymore. That is the reason for the match on Saturday. I need a break for real. I want it to be over. Well I just need time think about everything. Steph said we would need an excuse for my long absence. So I thought if I fore fill Thie his wish it would be a win-win-solution. " That was the most Dean had talked in a week and Roman tried to process all the information. "Dean, would you stop for a second so I can follow. First. No need for an apology. You have every right to cry if you need to. And let me tell you something. Crying is not a sign of weakness. A strong person isn't the one who never cries. A strong person is one who sheds tears and cries for a while, then gets back up and fights again. I just want you to know that I would never think you're weak. Damn, Dee with everything you've been through, as far as I know, you're the strongest person I've ever met. Second. I don't think you stupid for being so unconditionally in love. You are just true to your feelings. That's pretty fucked up right now. But maybe we can fix it. And last but not least. What do you mean Steph said we need a reason for your absence? How long you are planning to take a break? Don't get me wrong take your time but I am going to miss you, bro. Maybe I should talk to Steph, so I get a chance to beat the heck out of Thie after he 'stomped' you in the ground. That would be fun and just because you brought the match up yourself. You need to talk to Seth about it and not just one day before the actual fight. You know that, right?" Dean turned all white as he heard HIS full name and he looked his big brother in the eyes. "I know. Did he call you to tell me that he wants to meet me?" He exhaled audibly. "And about your question how long I am planning to take a break. At least a month, Rome. Because I can't do this anymore the way I do it right now. And I'm sorry for leaving you all by yourself with all the work. But would you promise me something, please?" The tall handsome guy looked at his brother who seemed to be so reasonable today. "How did you know he called me to get you to meet him? But you are right, he did. Sorry when the memories of him are still hurting you." Dean looked with stunned eyes to the only person that could keep him sane these days. "I could see it in your eyes. Wow a month, I didn't expect to be that long all by myself. But I guess it will be good for you and the best thing you can do right now. But you are coming back, aren't you? And would you stop worrying about me, please. Everything is going to be ok. You're one of my best friends and I will always be there for you." During all the talking they actually finished their workout session. Now they were standing in front of the water fountain. "Thanks Roman. I know you won't let me down. Thie called me too but I didn't pick up. Would you tell him that I will meet him around 11.00 am tomorrow? And Rome, would you mind being there too, just in case? I would appreciate it." The young Samoan didn't have to think twice about it. "Sure thing, Dee! I will be there, just to make sure that you behave." Both men chuckled. "What do you need me to promise you?" The bigger man ask out of curiosity. "I don't mind you beating him up after our match. That actually fits the storyline perfectly. But would you promise me that you don't let emotions take over you. Sometimes you underestimate your own strength while you are full of emotions. Please, promise me, you won't hurt him too bad. Please!" Dean's eyes were focused on Roman's face so he wouldn't miss his reaction. "Dean, I never let emotions rule me. You should know me by now. But if it makes you feel better I promise I won't hurt him too bad." Dean still looked his brother in the face and he knew he had to explain his concerns. "Roman, I want you to give me that promise because I know you too well. You are always so passionate when it comes down to protect your family. You . . . we've never been in that kind of situation. It will be the first time I will be carded away on a stretcher and you two know it won't be fake. Because I won't be conscious that I can promise you. So please, promise me to keep your word and don't let your emotions take control." The tall man realized his brother and friend was right. He would do anything to protect his loved ones and Dean was certainly one of them. He was his brother and best friend and he loved him. "Man, you do know me very well. I promise that I won't let myself be controlled by my emotions in this moment and hurt him only as little as necessary. I give you my word, Dean. But you have to promise me something in return. Would you try not to get hurt too much? Please follow every safety rule that there is for that stunt. Promise me." Dean searched in his brother eyes for some room to debate but there wasn't any. "I'll try." Roman grabbed Dean's shoulder and shook him. "Not good enough. Come on, Dean. Give my mind some peace. Say you promise me." Now the man with the blue eyes saw the worries in the taller man's eyes, he just gave in. "I promise you, Rome. And thanks again for taking care of me. Love you, bro!" Dean gave him a big hug and pulled out the key for his bike. "See you tomorrow, Dean. Love you too, bro. Take care." Dean took off with a sad smile and Roman was eager to get to his family.

Seth was losing his mind. Why hadn't Roman call him already? Was he still mad at him? Or was Dean a stubborn five-year old with a temper? He was pacing back and for in his living room and didn't pay attention to the TV. His thought were again all over Dean. The emptiness in his gorgeous eyes. The change in his fights. The reason for all his pain. Damn it! What had happened to Dean? How much of it was his fault? Would he be able to fix it? Ever again. Seth missed being with his brothers but he missed Dean especially. You know what you gave up, when it's finally gone. You appreciate all of it and you really know you are the one who screwed it up. Seth knew he left his happiness behind and caused both of his brothers the worst pain ever. And all of that just because he didn't tell the truth. Every two seconds he looked at his phone. Finally it rang. It was almost 8pm. "Seth, sorry for calling so late I got caught up in my family. I talked to Dean and he agreed to meet you at 11 am at gym in the Pine Rd." The young Samoan heard his little brother taking a deep breath of relief. "Thanks Rome, you are the best. Did you have a hard time to convince him that it is for the best if he would give me some advice?" His big brother seemed so calm but in some ways also worried. "No, I didn't need to talk him into that. He knew that you already called him. So he figured that you wanted to talk about the stunt. He agreed without making a fuss. But I need you to know that I will be there too. He doesn't trust himself anymore so he wants me to be there to watch out for him. I guess you're bringing Joey and Jamie, right?" Seth felt his heart breaking in his chest. What happened to the confidence of Dean and his cocky comments? "I guess. I can't get them to leave when Dean is that close. They really think he is crazy and out of his mind." Now he needed to smile. How could someone think that Dean lost his mind? He is just really good at his job. But to his surprise Roman signed. "They might be right. I did something today I thought I never had to. But I need to help him and you still know him best. I send you an audio data a couple minutes ago. It's not the whole conversation we had. But you said to me, you don't believe me how bad it is, so see for yourself! I will tell Dean that I send that to you after the match. Because you know I can't lie to save my life. So let's call it for tonight. See you tomorrow, bro. Take care. Bye." Seth wanted to say something but he was all chocked up. He forced Roman to betray his principles. He was really a fool to think his words wouldn't affect his grey-eyed big brother who would do anything to protect his family. He was so scared to check his phone for that data Rome had mentioned let alone listen to it. His hands were sweaty and his eyes burned from the tears that were already leaving them. His chest was so tight it was so hard to breath in that very moment. Did he really wanted to know? Was he ready to break down when he heard Dean's voice not spitting awful names at him? He didn't know answers to all of those questions except that he wanted to fix everything between himself and his brothers. And if that meant he had to listen to Dean telling Roman how he felt then it had to be. He needed to be strong. He flipped his phone around and saw the little light flashing that told him he got a message. He unlooked it and opened the audio from his brother who suffered so much that he had to do it this way. The sneaky, dishonest way. Just because Dean was stubborn like a five-year old and he was a coward with too much pride for not telling the truth. Even he didn't know what would happen he pressed play on his phone and listened carefully to the conversation between his beloved brothers.

 _"How are you by the way?"_

" _I am fi- . . . I . . . fuck I don't know, Rome. Really I think I'm losing it. All I fucking want to do is sleep. Just sleep. It hurts so fucking bad. I miss him. Do you think I'm stupid for still loving him...? I am so freaking scared to let anyone close to me again. Sorry, Rome. I feel really guilty for yelling at you yesterday when you were trying to comfort me, bro. But I just couldn't stand the fact that you saw me so weak. I don't want to be like that anymore. That is the reason for the match on Saturday. I need a break like for real. I just need time think about everything. Steph said we would need an excuse for my long absence. So I thought if I fore fill Thie his wish it would be a win-win-solution."_

 _"No need for an apology. You have every right to cry if you need to. Damn, Dee with everything you've been through, as far as I know, you're the strongest person I've ever met. I don't think you stupid... You are just true to your feelings… What do you mean Steph said we need a reason for your absence? How long you are planning to take a break? Don't get me wrong take your time but I am going to miss you, bro. Maybe I should talk to Steph, so I get a chance to beat the heck out of Thie after he 'stomped' in the ground."_

 _"At least a month, Rome. Because I can't do this anymore the way I do it right now. And I'm sorry for leaving you all by yourself with all the work. But would you promise me something, please?"_

" _Wow a month, but you are coming back, aren't you? What do you need me to promise you?"_

" _I don't mind you beating him up after our match. That actually fits the storyline perfectly. But would you promise me that you don't let emotions take over you. You sometimes underestimate your own strength when you are full of emotions. Please, promise me you won't hurt him to bad. Please!"_

 _"I never let emotions rule me. You should know me by now. But if it makes you feel better I promise I won't hurt him too bad."_

" _Roman, I want you to give me that promise because I know you too well. You are always so passionate when it comes down to protect your family. You . . . we've never been in that kind of situation. It will be the first time I will be carded away on a stretcher and you two know it won't be fake. Because I won't be conscious that I can promise you. So please, promise me to keep your word and don't let your emotions take control."_

" _I give you my word, Dean. But you have to promise me something in return. Would you try not to get hurt too much? Please follow every safety rule that there is for that stunt. Promise me."_

" _I'll try."_

Seth had to swallow hard after he heard the last words. He had sweaty hands and he just realized that tears were rolling down his face at lightning speed. What the fuck? That couldn't be true. All the pain in Dean's and so much worries in Rome's voices. Now he knew it was bad. It was really bad and a big part of this was his fault. Dean wanted to take a break for a month or more. The question Roman had asked Dean in this part of the conversation was echoing in his head. ' _But you are coming back, aren't you?' '_ That can't be happening! Dean loves what he is doing but that sounded like a farewell for a long time. No, no, no, no! I have to make it up to him as soon as possible.' But how was he supposed to look his two brothers in the eyes after what he heard. He knew sleep wouldn't come easy to him this night. If he could sleep at all. He had to tell them the truth. Seth knew that he might lose them forever but he had to try to fix it.

 **So did you like my treat?**

 **Let's call it my belated surprise Easter egg for you.**

 **Had fun with my friend who I am forcing to read the story so there won't be too much spelling and grammar mistakes. Always love it when she complains about my imagination. But I know she still loves me.**

 **So now I leave you alone for the next few weeks and you can recover. Hugs to all of you and again tell me what you think of my little story. :-***


	6. Ch 6 Memories, the bitter and the sweet!

**Hey there! It's me again. I hope I didn't keep you waiting too long. But you know life . . . :-P**

 **So now I am gonna shut up and you can enjoy the next chapter. Let me know if you see me losing my sanity.**

 **Keep reading and stick with our boys.**

 **Chapter 6 "Memories, the bitter and the sweet!"**

The next morning came way too fast. Just like Seth assumed he couldn't get rid of Joey and Jamie. They said to him they would do a bad job if they would let him go to be alone with his deadly enemy. He snapped at J&J because of the lack of sleep and his burning desire to be with his brothers. "Who do you think you are? You two don't know anything about Dean and Roman. They would never hurt me for real. They are very professional. We all know that this is our job." Jamie wanted to dissent. "But Seth . . ." The two-tuned man cut him off with a stern glace and said. "No buts, Jamie! If I can't make you leave so just come along. You can sit in a corner and watch us work. You're not allowed to speak without permission and you won't interfere in any situation. Did you get that?" The security nodded and let Seth know they respected his wish. Both were almost sure that nothing would happen. And they seem to understand that it was very important to Seth to do that stunt the right way. The young men actually really liked Seth. He was a kind boss. They understood that the young man with the funny hair missed his brothers real bad. Jamie and Joey wanted to help Seth to make it right again even though Dean was giving him a hard time to apologize. For their boss it was very important to get the stunt right because he didn't want to hurt his brother anymore. But Joey wasn't so sure if Dean would let that happen. He wouldn't call Dean unstable but definitely unpredictable. You couldn't plan for a guy like Ambrose and that was the reason why Joey was always in alert when Dean was close. He didn't want Seth to get seriously hurt. But he also knew if he didn't obey his boss would be really mad.

They drove to the address Seth had given them and were shocked to see that wrecked gym. But as soon as they saw Seth's smile both of them relaxed a bit. The brown-eyed man took his gym bag out of the trunk and signified them to follow. Some painful memories washed over him as he walked into the old gym "The Shield" used to conquer. The three men heard loud laughter from the inside of the sports hall. The sight that greeted Seth let his heart skip a beat. His brothers were sitting on the floor of the ring all sweaty and laughing their butts off. "I told you, Rome. You can't beat me when I'm allowed to use my dirty tricks!" Dean smiled and he looked like a happy kid. Roman had to hold his stomach because he laughed so hard. "Ha, ha . . . you really did it. But tell me how you're going to call that move. 'Side-splitting'? Because I can't do anything but laugh right now." The lunatic felt so light like he hadn't felt in months. He looked at his 'big brother' and needed to smile again. "They call me unstable but don't you think they should call me unpredictable? Because I caught you off guard, right? Ha, Ha!" Seth saw that Rome was really happy to see one of his best friends smiling again. "Dean, thanks. Thank you for smiling again. Finally you're smiling again. That you didn't smile anymore was breaking my heart, dude." Dean looked his very serious friend in the eyes and tugged him close to his chest. "I am sorry, big guy. I didn't mean to hurt you." Roman put his arms around his brother and shook his head. "It's okay, bro." Seth swallowed the lump in his throat. He put one of his hands over his heart because he thought it would break right there. The picture of his brothers in this very intense moment was just way too cute but it also hurts so much.

He was torn between screaming in agony or join his brothers with a big smile. He remembered the audio-message from Roman. His heart broke again! He promised himself after the match with Dean, he would make it up to his best friends. He had to tell them the truth and had to hope they would or could forgive him for what he did. For now he pulled himself together and greeted the men in the ring with a faked smile. But sometimes this are the bravest smiles we offer to the people we love. So they wouldn't have to hurt even more . . . "Hey you two, good morning. What is so funny? We could hear you outside." But Seth couldn't know that no matter what . . . when Dean hears his voice he is in pain but also lost in desire. As soon as he spoke the smile on Dean's face died and his eyes were filled with pain for a moment. It was Roman who put a hand on his shoulder and whispered something in his ear. Dean turned to his big brother and also said something too quiet for Seth to hear and both of his brothers started to laugh again. Dean looked at Seth still with pain in his eyes. "You need a tour or do you remember where the locker room is?" That question was delivered with a cocky grin on his lips and Seth believed that Dean was really in a good mood. All of them knew it was because of the location. It was their favorite place to be and hang out in the good old days. Seth and Roman hoped that Dean's mood would stay a while like this. He was more reasonable when he was in a good mood and he could understand their point of view easier. "No tour needed, if they didn't re-model the whole place." Seth smiled Dean's favorite grin as he took off to the locker. Dean put his head on Rome's shoulder for a moment and J&J saw that the taller man talked in a soothing voice to his friend.

As Seth came out of the locker he was greeted with a picture painted by angels. There was a shirtless Dean Ambrose and a Roman Reigns without a vest, just wearing a really tight fitting tank top. He felt his jar drop to the floor and he had to absorb the sight of it. His two favorite people in the world were setting up everything for the stunt practice. He walked closer and could feel Jamie and Joey's eyes burn a hole in his back. He wasn't scared at all as he saw that his brothers were looking up at him and smiled. "I could have helped you with the preps. But it looks like you are done already." Roman put his arm around his shoulder, pulled him closer and reminded him. "You need to concentrate on the details of the stunt so you hurt Dean as little as possible. So don't worry about anything else." Dean looked at his two favorite people in the world and was fighting the urge to pull both of them into a warm embrace. He missed days like this so much. "Rome is right if you don't pay attention I might be paralyzed or even worse." He smirked at his brothers then the lunatic was joking but the fear on their faces were priceless. "D-Dean, don't say things like this. I am scared enough that I'll hurt you too much. So please, please don't be reckless like always." Seth was just too cute when he was trying to convince someone to do what he wanted them to do. Roman and Dean always said that was the only reason why they did what Seth asked them to do and because they were brothers. "Stop it, Thie! We're going to be fine. I am just joking." Rome spanked him hard in the back of his head. "Ouch, Rome! What was that for?" Dean asked innocently and was greeted with the furious eyes of his big brother. "This is not funny, Ambrose. Not at all. Can't you tell that you're putting Sethie under too much pressure? If he fails that stunt then that's your own fault. So stop that childish behavior and be a little more serious about your own life, would you? If you don't care if you die I can blow out your candle right now." Seth stepped between his brothers. He remembered Rome's words on the phone yesterday. He was here to watch out for Dean and now he was the one being all light headed. The young Samoan was right in Dean's face and he was angry with him. "Rome, don't be angry with him. He is just joking. Dean loves his life and he just wants to make me mad. He won't play with his life. So calm down, big brother." He looked at Dean and said with a smile. "Am I right, Dee? You didn't want to make Rome angry and you're not playing with your life." After all those weeks while they were just beating the crap out of each other, finally . . . Dean finally pulled Seth into a hug and smirked. "You are right, Thie. Sorry Rome, I was just messing with you two. You should have seen your faces. Just priceless. Ha-ha! But now let's get to work. So stop being mad at me, it was a joke." He squeezed Seth for a blink of an eye as close as possible and smiled Seth's favorite smile. The one which showed off his adorable dimples all the way. Roman looked at his best friends and gave them a big hug. "Are you ready? So listen to me!" Dean pulled a dummy which wore his tank top from behind the table and placed him on the cinder blocks. He explained to Seth and Roman that Kane would hold him there in place after Seth gave him a 'peace of mind' on the announce table. After that he had to 'stomp' him through the cinderblocks without or just a little bit of hesitation. Dean explained to them, that the angle of his head and the place where Seth's boot would hit him were the most important things. It would make all the differences of how badly he would be hurt. The man with the unruly hair grabbed a red pen and drew a circle on the head of the dummy to show Seth where he had to connect his boot to his head. They went through the stunt a couple of times. They also discussed what they would do during the match. It was like in the old times. Seth and Dean clicked instantly . . . like they used to. You could say they were wrestling soulmates. It was still there and it felt awesome. And in the end all of them were sweating and had sour muscles but they were so happy like they all haven't been in weeks. It was almost like it used to. As Seth looked over to Jamie and Joey he snickered and signified his brothers to look at them. They were so relaxed after they saw that the three men really were focused on the things that would take place on Saturday that the two securities had fallen asleep. Roman wiped his forehead and pulled his two brothers closer. "Let's finish up and give J&J some more time to rest we know it can be a pain in the ass to be your babysitter. We need to clean up here and then we can hit the very welcomed shower."

It was one of the good days for Dean. He had really enjoyed the day with his family. He knew tonight he wouldn't need a drink. There was nothing he wanted to forget about today even though it hurts to be so close to Seth and at the same time so far away. He wouldn't want to waste the few good memories he got. He would make it till Saturday and then finally he would sleep for a day. Seth was on his way to cloud 9. He was able to be with Dean after all those beatings. He had the chance to talk to him and to touch him and Rome was just the big caring teddy bear he has always been. That was a really good day that he would hold dear in his mind. Dean's smile, Rome's protective instinct and all the fun in the ring. It was so nice to have this again. The two-tuned man would always remember this day. Roman couldn't stop smiling. It was one of the days he just would never forget. It felt so good, so right to have his brothers back. And to see Dean smiling for the first time in months and Seth just being his real self today, it was the best.

 **So that's the next chappy. What do you think? Like always I apologize for spelling mistakes and wrong punctuation. Hugs to all.**


	7. Chapter 7 One disaster coming up

**So and the next one is just for all of you who can't wait what will happen next. I love this story and I got a little obsessed. Bear with it. I love talking about feelings, except of my own.**

 **Enjoy! :-***

 **Chapter 7 "One disaster coming up"**

The days went by and the day of the big match came closer and closer. It was Thursday only two days away from the match as Dean's phone rang and he had the feeling there would be some bad news. "Dean, Dean! Man, I don't know what to do or who else to call. I know you probably want nothing more than to be by yourself right now. But you're the only one I can ask a favor without feeling weak." Roman's voice was all shaken up and he seemed to be really worried. "Rome, calm down. Take a deep breath, bro. And now tell me what happened and what you need me to do? And don't worry!" Panic wheeled up in Dean. That was so unlike Rome. He was always so damn calm. So calm that he sometimes was pissed off by his big brother and his ability to be always the responsible one. The guy who always thinks first before he acts. "Dean, it is b-a-d, really b-a-d. I need to take Lisa to the H-o-s-p-i-t-a-l! I can't talk freely right now because Leila sits on my lap and I don't want to scare her. It's also better if she doesn't see her m-o-m-m-y like this either. I can't get a hold of our babysitter and Seth is not picking up his phone. So you're my last hope. Would you mind watching Leila for a while, please? I wouldn't bother you if I had another choice." The blue-eyed man understood what his big brother went through in that moment. But he didn't understand why he made such a big deal out of asking him to watch his favorite niece in the world. "Roman, I can't believe you actually thought I would turn you down. I would never ever do that. Of course I will watch the little princess. I will be there in 15 minutes." He heard his brother exhaling in relief. "Thanks, bro. You the best. See you in a bit."

They hung up and Dean grabbed the little pink helmet with a princess in the back. He pulled on his leather jacket and grabbed his own dusty black helmet. Today he had to be the responsible one and show his brother that he was able to behave like a real grown up. He got on his bike and was on his way to Roman's house. He felt a little nervous what he should say to his big brother. But like always he would figure it out just in time. Roman was sitting on the front porch and held a baby phone in his hand. The speaker was set up right next to the love of his life. Leila was bouncing up and down in front of the fence on the porch. "Uncle Dee, Uncle Dee! I'm going to spend some time with him, right Daddy? He is my babysitter for today. Because you and mommy need to go somewhere. Yeah, Uncle Dee." Roman looked his precious girl in the eyes and saw nothing but happiness, excitement and joy. And he realized that his daughter missed her uncles just as much as he missed his brothers. "Yes, princess. You get to spend some time with Uncle Dee. Are you happy that you can see him again? He hasn't been here for a while now." The little girl with the dark hair and the grey eyes turned around and smiled the widest smile her father had ever seen. "Yes, I am very happy. I miss Uncle Dee and Uncle Thie just like you daddy. They haven't been here for sooooo long." By the word 'so' she spread her arms as far as her little body would let her. And now Roman had to smile at his smart little girl who knew exactly how he felt. He was about to say something as they heard a motorcycle in the driveway. To the young Samoan's surprise his brother was wearing a helmet. "Hey there, you two." Dean greeted them with a big smile. He waved at Leila. "Hello princess. Holy heaven, you got so big compare to the last time I saw you. You are really becoming a young lady." The little girl looked up to her father with questioning eyes. Roman smiled and nodded. In that second his daughter ran down the stairs and flung herself in the arms of her prince, her babysitter for today. "Uncle Dee! I missed you!" After Dean had caught her and scooped her up in his arms, she put her little arms around his neck and gave him a little kiss-kiss on his nose and asked with a mischievous smirk on her lips. "Did you miss me too?"

Dean saw that his big brother was torn between the obviously cute scene his daughter and his brother shared and the urge of putting his wife in the car and take her to get the help she needed. "I did, princess. How about we go to the playground? We could ride the 'horse' over there, I brought your helmet. What do you think?" The eyes of that little girl grew bigger and bigger. "Yes, yes I want to ride the 'horsy' with you and I want to go to the playground!" Leila was about to climb on the 'horse' when Dean looked at her and smiled. "Princess, you do need to grab a jacket if we gonna ride the 'horse'. You know that the wind will be chilly. Did your daddy pack a bag for you?" The five-year-old girl looked up to the porch. "Where did daddy go? Did mommy wake up? She is not feeling well." The blue-eyed man shrugged and petted her head. "Leila, could you wait on the porch for me. I will talk to your daddy. And have an eye on the 'horse', I don't want it to run off. Just tell him now and then to stand still." The dark-haired girl nodded and smiled like she was very amused by her uncle. She grabbed Dean's leg and hugged it tight with a smile. She loved it when Uncle Dee played along with her and pretended his motorcycle was a horse and he was her prince.

Dean opened the door to Roman's house after he petted Leila on her head and saw him carrying Lisa down the stairs. She looked really sick and very weak. The young Samoan placed her on the couch. He looked like he didn't know what to do. Dean could see that his big brother was totally stressed out. He walked two steps up to Rome and pulled him in a tight hug. "Rome, calm down. Take a deep breath. You don't have to worry about Leila, we gonna have a blast. You need to take Lis to the nearby hospital. Do you have her insurance card? You can pick up some clothes and a towel later. First she needs to be treated. Do you need help putting her in the car?" The tall man did as he was told and took a deep breath. It actually helped him. Lisa mustered up all the strength she could and raised her voice. "Romeo, its fine. You're doing everything the right way. You got someone special to take care of Leila and now you're bringing me to the doctors. I think it's just a food poisoning. Everything is going to be okay, honey. You are the best thing that ever happened to me. I love you. And Dean, thank you. Take good care of my baby and watch out for my hubby." Now both man were moved by the words of Roman's wife. "Okay, Dean. Here is Leila's backpack. There is everything in there you two are going to need. Her jacket is right next to the door. Call me if you need anything. So baby, I love you too. More than my own life. Let's put you in the car and get going. So you will get better very soon. And Dean thanks again." His big brother set his priorities and focused on the most important thing now which is getting his wife to see a opened the door to the garage as the so called 'Romeo' carried his 'Juliet' to the car. "Bro, don't you worry about us. We will have fun and I will bring her to bed if I have to, you know that. Lis, taking care of your baby is my pleasure and I will watch out for Rome just like I always do. And you got to focus on getting better, so the worry-wrinkles disappear on his forehead. Love you all. So you need to get going and I have to take care of my princess." Dean petted Lisa's arm and smiled. After that he pulled Rome in a tight hug and told him encouraging words. "You can do it. She is going to be okay real soon. Now move it, bro." All what the young Samoan could do was hug back. He was so grateful to his brother and he knew he owned him something. "Thanks, Dee! You are the best." Roman hit the remote for the garage door and Dean closed the door to the garage.

He went over to the entrance to pick up Leila's backpack and her jacket. When he moved out to the porch he was all caught up in the scene that greeted him. Leila was standing in front of his bike that he had parked right next to the stairs and told him. "Horsy, don't you move. We don't want you to get lost. Uncle Dee will be here any minute and then you can 'run' fast like the wind." Dean needed to snicker. He was instantly reminded why he missed that little girl so much. Because she was just a happy kid and didn't know anything about pain. Just the small and big worries of a five-year-old and all what Dean wanted, was to keep it that way. He would break his back to keep that little girl from any harm and worries. He refused to let her re-live his own crappy childhood. The childhood not even his two best friends and brothers knew about. Because it pained him too much to think about let alone to talk about it. "Hey there, princess. I see you took good care of my horse. Ready to go?" Leila looked up at her prince for the day and smiled a huge smile. With a pretend deep voice she invoked her father. "I am as ready as I can be."

 **Hope you like it. I got to get up early tomorrow. What do you think about my little story so far? Hugs to all of you.**


	8. Chapter 8 Little worries and good news

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything or anyone except my imagination. All stories are for fun. I like to share them.**

 **Finally you get to read the next chapter. I'm pretty sure you couldn't await it. Right now the weather at home sucks. So I keep on writing! Let me know what you think. Hugs to all of you.**

 **Enjoy! :-***

 **Chapter 8 "Little worries and good news"**

They rode the 'horsy' to the playground. All the people looked at them. It looked way too cute to not notice them. Leila was sitting in front of Dean zipped up in his leather jacket and holding on very tight to it. The lunatic was driving very carefully because of his princess. As he stopped right next to the playground he noticed that all the mothers over there checked him out. And Leila was the star of all the other kids. He needed to snicker again as he heard Leila talking to a pretty dark-haired boy around her age. "You see that is my uncle Dee and this is his 'horsy'. Let me feed the horse then we can play, okay Connor?" The boy seemed a little shy but nodded. "So horsy, there you go. Here is some grass for you." She placed a hand full of freshly ripped out grass in front of the motorcycle. "Uncle Dee will give you something to drink later, okay? And thanks for the nice ride. I loved it!" She petted the steel of the gas tank and started to walk off to play with her friend from school, Connor. Dean had to smile from ear to ear. He grabbed the backpack and moved over to a bench and took some pics for Rome and Lis so they knew her precious girl was enjoying herself. Leila came over to Dean after some time and asked him if he could help her to climb up the big slide. Dean took her hand and said smiling. "Your wish is my command, princess. Which slide you want to go to?" The women who were close enough to hear them started to admire Dean. They watched him with dreamy eyes. As they were close to the slide Leila stopped in her tracks. The blue-eyed prince looked down and saw big tears rolling down her checks. He was shocked and kneeled down next to her. "Hey princess, what's the matter? Tell me, Leila! Please don't cry. Tell me, what's scaring you." Leila crashed her head in Dean's chest and started to cry really hard. "Uncle Dee . . . {sniff} . . . is mommy gonna go to Jesus? I don't want her to be an angel." She held on to him as tight as her little body would let her. Dean was shocked to see his little princess in so much worries. "No, sweetie, no. She just needs to get some medicine and a good nap. Don't you worry? Your daddy watches out for her. He will bring her back home really soon." He scooped her up and hugged her close to him. Like he promised himself to take away every pain she would ever endure. But why did he feel so fucking helpless. Her tears were stabbing him like a thousand knives.

"Hey precious, calm down! You better listen to Uncle Dee. He is right. And now we need to dry your tears, princess." Now Seth understood why Roman had called him five times and now didn't return any off his calls. Lisa was sick and he needed someone to take care of Leila. He felt so guilty that he wasn't there for his big brother. As Dean heard his voice he looked to the right and his heart stopped right there. "Seth? What are you doing here?" He looked Dean in the eyes and he saw that Dean was kind of relieved to see him but also a bit confused. Seth put one of his arms hesitatingly around Dean's waist and with the other he wiped Leila's cheeks. "Uncle Thie! Do I get to spend some time with you after all? I missed you. I miss you both just as much as Daddy misses you." She motioned Seth to come closer and as he did she pulled her two favorite uncles in a long-lasting hug. Leila put a kiss on Seth's cheek and one on Dean's nose. "Uncle Dee, are you sure that mommy is going to be fine real soon?" She started to smile as Dean kissed her forehead and looked her in the eyes. "Yes princess. I've got a message from your daddy before you wanted me to help you climb the slides. The doctor said she just need to rest a little and take her medicine. And she will be home by tomorrow. So you get to spend some more time with me. Did you know that I miss you, Uncle Thie and your daddy just as much as you do? So dear princess, may I have the honor of putting you to bed tonight?" The dark-haired girl looked him deep in the eyes and smiled. "Of course you can put me to bed tonight. And you'll tell me one of your great stories like you used to when. . ." She stopped talking and had a very sad look painted on her little face. Seth and Dean looked at each other. "Leila, when what . . . ?" The slim man with the two-tuned hair petted the head of the little girl and wished he could take away all of her worries. "I was about to say when you and Uncle Dee used to put me to bed. I always liked it when you two were my babysitters. It was always so much fun. But daddy said you two are mad at each other. He told me you're fighting and you didn't figure out how to forgive one and another. Is that true?" Both men looked in shock at her. But Dean wanted to make her feel better and he wanted to proof to Rome and Seth that he is able to behave like a grown up. "Princess? Your daddy is right. Uncle Thie and I got something we need to work out and we're not quite there yet. I'll got to tell you . . . sometimes it sucks to be a grown up. But maybe we could ask Uncle Thie if he wants to come over and help me to take care of you tonight. What do you think, sweetie?" He said it to her and him. Because for Dean, they were the sweetest things he'd ever seen. Seth and Leila smiled his favorite's smiles and just made this the best moment ever. Because they were still standing in this hug. Dean held Leila on one arm and the other was placed on Seth's shoulder and held him as close as possible. When the brown-eyed man was trying to answer, Leila's friend from school came over and pulled on Seth's shirt. "Uncle Seth, did Leila hurt herself?" The man with the sloppy ponytail bend down and scooped the shy boy up. "No, Connor. She was just a bit upset about her mommy being at the hospital. But her uncle and I told her that everything is going to be okay. She is your friend from school, right? May I introduce you to one of my best friends? Connor that is Dean, Dean this is Connor. He is my sister's son." Dean looked at the pretty little boy and now he knew where he got the looks. The blue-eyed man took his hand from Seth's shoulder to shake his hand with a smile. "Nice to meet you, Connor. We met a little while ago. Do you remember?" The boy with the shy brown eyes took Dean's hand. "I do. You are Leila's cool uncle with the awesome bike. But why does Leila calls it 'horsy'?" He turned to Seth and ask pouting. "And why do you never take me for a ride with your bike, Uncle Seth?" Dean looked at Seth and asked with a cocky smile. "You never took him for a ride?" He needed to snicker because he knew Seth would never do something to piss off his big sister and taking her boy for a ride on his Harley would definitely do so. She was very protective of her family and Seth was her baby brother, the youngest of four children. So she was freaking out already when he was riding it by himself. Yet alone of his choice to support himself. The long haired man poked him playfully in his rips still holding his nephew in his arms. Connor looked at Leila. "Leila, are you feeling better? You will see, your mommy is going to get better real soon." He motioned to Seth to step a bit closer. The shy boy put his arms around his only friend and gave her a hug. "Let's go to the big slide. Your uncle Dee can help us climb to the top and Uncle Seth will catch us at the bottom. What you think?" Leila returned the hug Connor gave her and answered with a wide smile. "Thanks Connor. You are my best friend and I love your plan. And maybe we could have dinner together. Uncle Thie could you call Connor's mum and ask if we can have a sleepover. But you have to bring us to school tomorrow, Uncle Dee. Would you do that? Please!" Connor joined in and looked at his favorite uncle with sparkling eyes and a wide smile. "Yeah, please Uncle Seth, please. I don't want Leila to be all by herself tonight when her mommy is at the hospital. I am a man and I have to protect her. So please could you ask mum if we can stay. Please!" Seth looked at Dean and both men needed to snicker because of the words from the shy five year old boy.

After a great game of 'conquer the castle' Dean got a message from his big brother that Lisa was out of danger and that he had good news that he didn't want to spill over the phone. The man with the unruly hair came up with that game which the kids loved from the first minute. The man with the two-tuned hair was stunned by the imagination of his best friend. Dean was always the one who brought a smile to the face of every kid they met. No matter, if it was a fan they met at a signing session or if he made Leila smile just by being around her. Seth loved that about Dean but he was very surprised that Connor opened up so quickly to him. Because he was very shy. As far as he knew, Leila was his only friend in school and that was the reason why he called his sister to ask her about the sleepover. "Hey sis!" But Seth didn't have a chance to ask her because she took his call the wrong way. "Sethie, what happened? Is Connor hurt or don't you know how to calm him down? Or are you hurt, Sethie-boo?" Seth loved his sister, he really did but why did she still treated him like a little kid? "Susann, please, would you stop that? We are fine and actually if you would have let me tell you why I am calling than you probably would have saved you the high blood pressure you're having right now. Connor met his little girlfriend from school at the playground. You know, Roman and Lisa's daughter, Leila. She is here with her . . . babysitter." The young man with the brown eyes didn't want to mention Dean just now because he knew his sister thought he was sometimes a bad influence. "So, may I tell you why I am calling?" Seth couldn't see it but Susann blushed out of embarrassment. "Sethie, I am sorry. You're right I should stop to worry so much. I know that you are a great babysitter for Connor and he really loves it when you take care of him. Because you are way more relaxed than I am. So why are you calling?" Seth was a little surprised by the honesty of his big sister and had to swallow before he started talking again. "Sis, like I said Connor met Leila and she is having a rough day today. Roman had to take Lis to the hospital and she was very upset a while ago. So her babysitter asked me if I could ask you if we could have a sleepover. I know it's a weekday but I would be there too and we take them to school tomorrow. You should have heard Connor as the babysitter suggested the sleepover. It was so cute. He said he is a man and needed to protect Leila because he didn't want her to be all by herself while her mommy was at the hospital. So what do you say? You could have a cozy night with Howard too." On the other end he heard nothing. "Sis? Are you angry or so?" Susann thought carefully about what Seth said and decided to trust him. She also would love to have a nice evening with her husband. "Okay Sethie. You will be there, than its fine with me. And say hallo to Dean for me. If he scares or hurts either one of you, he has to deal with me and my anger. And send me some nice pictures so I know I did the right thing." Seth smiled and thought of the picture his sister put in his mind. She's all over Dean Ambrose with anger. It was hilarious. "Why don't you tell him yourself?" He handed the phone to his brother. They talked about how they will take the kids to school. Because Seth had an appointment at 8 am and Dean had a physical exam in the afternoon. They scheduled that Dean would drop the kids off and Susann would pick them up in the afternoon. Susann knew that Dean was a decent guy and even if her baby brother haven't told her yet, she knew that Seth cared very deeply for the rough soul. Dean snickered and talked for a while to Susann. He made some promises and told her again that he would take the kids to class tomorrow morning. As they were finally done he handed the phone back to Seth with a cocky grin on his face. Seth told his sister again and again that she shouldn't worry so much. And then they said their goodbyes and Seth exhaled audibly. He couldn't believe that his sister gave her permission for the sleepover. The handsome man looked over to the swings and saw Dean pushing both kids. He took a few pictures because the kids giggled so much from all fun that Dean was bringing them. He send three of them to his sister and she responded with a grateful _'Thank you, Sethie! You make this much easier. :-*'_ The two-tuned man was very happy. Dean came over after a while and told him it was time to go. They gave Connor and Leila a couple more minutes and then they would leave.

 **Hope you like it. What do you think about my little story so far?** **Hugs to all of you.**


	9. Chapter 9 Unexpected

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything or anyone except my imagination. All stories are for fun. I like to share them.**

 **Today I sit with two of my friends. They are helping me to present you with a treat. I hope you still stick with our boys. I don't know how it happened but this story is going to be way longer than I anticipated. I will torture my editor friend for a while.**

 **Enjoy! :-***

 **Chapter 9 "Unexpected"**

Dean and Leila got on his bike and Seth and his nephew got in his car. The prince and the princess arrived at the house first. Leila asked her uncle Dee why they weren't here yet and he explained that they were picking up some clothes and the school stuff for Connor. He asked her in a very responsible voice. "Do we need to clean up your room a bit before they'll be here?" Her cheeks blushed and she was off to pick up the toys she left there this morning. Dean walked in and put some of her clothes away. He got the extra mattress and made everything ready so Connor would have a nice bed to sleep in. A couple minutes after he was done he heard the door and looked at Leila. He scooped her up and called out. "Roman? Is that you?" His brother answered right away because he heard the anxiety in Dean's voice. "Yeah, Dee it's me. How was the playground?" In relief he put Leila back down and she called. "Daddy, daddy! You are back. Where is mommy?" The young Samoan picked her up and threw her up in the air what made her giggle. "Hey, Rome. Welcome back. How is Lis? Is she feeling better?" He stopped for a minute and looked his brother in the eyes. "What?" The long-haired man caught Dean starring in his face. "Why are you smiling like a goddamn idiot? What is it?" Roman didn't know that it was written all over his face. He was on cloud 9 right now. "Come and sit with me. Like I said I got good news. First of all. Leila, mommy is feeling just fine. The doctor gave her some medicine and she slept a while." The little girl smiled and asked hopefully. "Is she coming home today?" Her father petted her head and kissed her cheek. "No, sweetie. But she will be home tomorrow when you come back from school. Do you want to know why mommy felt so sick?" He looked at his brother who nodded slightly and then he felt Leila's hand on his cheek. "Yes daddy I want to know. Is she not sick anymore tomorrow?" He took his daughter and placed her in his lap. "That is the whole point, princess. Your mommy is not sick. But you are going to have a baby brother or a baby sister. Your mommy is having a baby and you are going to be a big sister." Roman looked at his little girl and she smiled from one ear to the other. "Yippy, I am going to be a big sister." Dean pulled Roman in a tight hug after Leila jumped off his lap and danced around in the living room. "Rome, congratulations. I am so happy for the two of you." Dean smiled also a very wide smile and Roman asked him Lisa's wish. "Man, I know it is still early for this but I need to ask you a question. Would you be the godfather of my second child? Lis and I want you to be." The man with blue eyes was a bit surprised and looked at his best friend with questioning eyes. "Me? Are you serious? Why not Thie? He is Leila's godfather. This is a little unexpected!" The long-haired man looked at him and said. "Honestly? We didn't know you too well at the time when Leila was born. And now I want my brothers to be equal in my life. Because I love you both just like real brothers and consider you as family. And Lis just adores you two, she always tells me to bring you two over because she enjoys your company just as much as I do. And I'm not going to start and talk about Leila, she loves you both so much." Dean felt his cheeks burning and pulled Rome to his shoulders. The man was moved by the words of his brother. "Rome, thank you for all your trust and tell Lis, it will be a great honor to be the godfather of your second child." He added that they are going to have a sleepover with Connor. Again Roman felt like he owned his brother something. "Dean, how can I make it up to you? I seriously owe you big time. You really don't mind watching them and bring them to school tomorrow." Dean smacked his best friend playfully and said. "Of course I don't mind and you don't own me anything. But I got a question for you. Are you going to go back to Lis?" The man with the caring eyes nodded a little shy. "Then I suggest that you take my bike there. So I can bring the kids to school in your car and after that I'll come over to the hospital and get my bike back so you'll be able to bring Lis' home safely. Seth is coming over with Connor. He is staying here with me for the night but he has an appointment at 8 am in downtown. But we're going to put Connor's car-seat in your car. When I drop them off I leave both car-seats at school and Susann is picking them up in the afternoon." Roman starred at his brother and asked with an evil smile. "Who the hell are you and where is my chaotic, unstable, recklessly little brother?" The man with the unruly hair just shrugged. "Is it so weird when I am responsible?" He sounded a bit hurt and now it was Roman who pulled him in a hug. "No, I didn't want to hurt your feelings, brother. I know you're a responsible guy. That is the reason why they all want a storyline with you. That is the reason why it's so much fun to 'fight' you. But I didn't know you're an organizational talent. You're really a big help today and I am sorry that you also have to deal with Seth today. Right before you two have your big match. And I do owe you big time. You're the best. Love you, bro. But you're really giving me your bike?" Dean got a serious look on his face. "If she gets one scratch you are dead meat, brother!" Now both man chuckled and Roman started to get ready to leave. He grabbed some stuff for Lisa and himself to stay at the hospital for the night.

He was just about to leave when Seth pulled in the driveway. He really hoped that Dean wouldn't be in too much pain with Seth around. He really needed to think of something to pay him back that huge favor. He came down the stairs when he heard his precious little girl laughing. He saw her hugging her best friend, Connor. Dean had told him what the little shy boy had said. "So Connor, you are my man. And you'll gonna to take care of my little girl, do you? And you two will be good and listen to Dean and Seth, right?" Leila walked up to her father and signified him to scoop her up what he did without hesitation. "Daddy, we will. Right, Connor?" She wanted to look behind her but then she saw that Dean was holding him in his arms and was standing right next to them. The pretty little boy nodded and smiled. "I know you will, princess. I love you. Do I get a goodbye-kiss?" She smiled and gave him a big hug and kissed him goodbye. "Daddy but you have to take another kiss with you!" Dean thought Roman's face was just priceless in this very moment. "You need to bring mommy my good-night-kiss. Are you doing that for me?" Now all three men needed to smile. Seth was standing right next to Dean and had followed the whole scene in silence. "Of course, sweetie. I will give your mommy the kiss. But I need to go now." So Leila gave him a second kiss and hugged him really tight one more time. Dean put Connor down at the same time Roman put his little one down. He pulled out the keys for his bike and gave his brother a certain look. The young Samoan chuckled and said. "I know, I know if she has a scratch I am so screwed." He pulled him in a hug and whispered in his ear. "I owe you big time. And I thank you so much for doing this and Lis made me say the following. 'They are the best friends and protectors that we could wish for our children. When these two idiots will get over their huge egos they will be first choice for a babysitter. Because together they are incredible and bring happiness to the kids.' Quote finished!" The young man with the clear blue eyes didn't say anything. He just grabbed his helmet and one of Romans jackets to place the helmet on the head of his brother and handed him the jacket. "Just drive carefully. You are going to be needed more than before. And again I am so happy for you and wish you the best. Would you mind telling Lis, that I . . . I will try, really try!" Before the grey-eyed man could respond, Seth came running from the living room with big smile and screamed. "Is this true, Rome. Is this for real? You are going to have a baby?" The elder men looked at an excited Seth Rollins and then at each other. "Just to make something one thing clear, not I am having the baby, but Lis will. Yes, it's true." Seth jumped around because he was so happy for one of his best friends. "Congrats, Bro! This is awesome. Isn't this awesome, Dee?" The blue eyed man looked at the one he truly loved and nodded. He loved to see him so happy but it also brought him back the painful memories. He was always so happy when he was the one who made Seth smile that way. The tallest of handsome men smiled and tugged both of his baby brothers to his chest. This was a new unexpected chapter in their lives and maybe it was a new start for everyone.

 **So what do you say to the incidents that are taking place? See you next time. Reviews are welcomed. Talk to me. Btw aj-unstable send me a private message. And I will write a story featuring Roman/Dean just for you.**

 **Hugs to all of you.**


	10. Ch 10 Good old times and new beginnings

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything or anyone except my imagination. All stories are for fun. I like to share them.**

 **So lovies I got the next chapters for you. Life is very stressful right now. So you got to wait a bit for the next one's. Hope you will stick with the boys. I love this story. Do you also like my sick mind?**

 **Enjoy! :-***

 **Chapter 10 "Good old times and new beginnings"**

Rome had left to be with Lisa, the two-tuned was playing with the five-year-olds and the lunatic was preparing dinner. He made mac'n'cheese for the kids. For Seth and himself, he made some leftover chicken he found in the fridge. As Seth walked into the kitchen, he saw the man with the unruly hair glaring out of the window. He was overwhelmed form the sight of a Dean Ambrose who was so lost in thoughts. It was breathtakingly beautiful. All of a sudden he heard him sighing. He had to fight some tears away. What was he thinking about? A sad smile crossed Dean's face while he was thinking of the many nights he was babysitting with Seth. The long-haired man knew exactly what his favorite person was thinking about. He just knew Dean so well. The times when Leila was already sleeping and they would end up on the couch. They would talk about everything under the sun. The lunatic loved to watch Seth while they talked. Sometimes the two-tuned would get really worked up about a topic and Dean would pull him close and tell him it will be okay. The moments when they had to chase away Leila's nightmares. Just all the things that were good memories but at the same time a crucial reminder of what Dean couldn't have anymore. The moment Seth turned heels all of this broke apart and no matter how much he tried to fix it, Dean just wouldn't let him. The tortured soul of his couldn't bring itself to forgive him. Just because he was scared to be the one who would get hurt again by the only person he loved so unconditionally. Yes, even Dean Ambrose was scared sometimes because this was nothing he could control. Physical pain was something he could handle very easily. You could almost say he is used to it. But emotional pain caused by someone he loves and trusts, that was even too much for him. And yet again it felt like dying just like it had all those years back. All those years back when he lost the other person he loved unconditionally forever. 'No, no, I don't need those painful memories right now.' Dean thought to himself and chased away the one thing he doesn't like to remember. But he also knew it was the only thing he could never ever forget. Seth wanted to bring him back to the here and now. So he cleared his throat. "Dean, tell me dinner is ready or the kids are going to eat me. Please, be my hero." As if Dean had to do anything to be his hero. But he wanted that pain in his beautiful blue shades to disappear now and forever. The younger man knew he had to work hard for this but he wouldn't stop trying. Dean needed to snicker and pulled him close. That simple act surprised Seth and his mind doubled over. What was happening here? "Oh, Thie what do I have to do to be your hero? Just tell you dinner is ready, nothing more? Hmmm . . . then I am truly sorry to disappoint you. Dinner still needs about 6 to 8 minutes." The answer was presented with a cocky smile which Seth didn't see because he looked down to Dean's chest. Seth's eyes grew very sad all of a sudden he didn't think Dee would throw his attempt of being funny right back at him. He just wanted to cheer him up and not to make it worse for his brother. He was about to pull himself out of Dean's arms, his favorite place to be. But as soon as the man with the clear blue eyes saw the pain in his little brother's face, he tried to take it back. He didn't want to be the one who caused Seth any pain today. They should enjoy today as much as possible because they wouldn't be together for a while, according to Dean's plans. "Hey, hey don't look at me like this, baby brother. Maybe it is enough to be your hero if I tell you dinner is almost ready. Would it?" The last question was delivered a sweet smile and showed off his adorable dimples. The pain in Seth's eyes parted and he needed to smile. "You know perfectly well that this is more than enough. You are the best. You saved me!" Seth pushed himself closer to Dean and hugged him really tight. Then he looked him deep in his ocean colored eyes and smiled Dean's favorite smile. "I'll get the kids ready for dinner and you're better watch the chicken before it'll turns into a piece of coal." The taller man was very happy to see the man he loved smiling at him like there was no tomorrow. He ruffled Seth's hair and said. "Are you doubting my cooking skills? It will taste better than the so called 'pasta ala Seth.' Believe that!" Dean lifted Seth up and hugged him really tight and smiled. He enjoyed being so close to him without having to fight. He wanted to make this day mean something to both of them. "So you should get the kids ready because Dinner is ready." Seth was very surprised as Dean lifted him up without much effort. Did Dean finally change his mind and would forgive him for what he had done? It was always so hard to read that man. But usually Seth was fairly good at it but today he had no clue why Dean was again the man he fell so hard for. So Seth called the kids and went with them to the bathroom. As the three of them showed up in the kitchen Dean placed the mac'n'cheese on the table. Smilingly he turned to Leila and Connor with a suspicious look. "Did you wash your hands? Let me check!" The kids needed to snicker as Dean kneeled down in front of them. He took their hands in his and smelled on them. Now the kids were smiling from ear to the other. "Uncle Dee, you are a silly goose." Leila pressed out between all the laughter and Connor added as he hugged Dean to the floor. "You are such a cool and funny babysitter Uncle Dean. Could you came and watch me when Uncle Seth babysits me next time? You are so much fun. Please!" Leila jumped on Dean's stomach and said pounding. "No, Uncle Dee is my babysitter." She scooped next to Connor and grabbed Dean's face with her little hands. "Am I right Uncle Dee? You are mine, right?" She gave him a kiss on his nose and smiled at him. "You are right, my princess. But that doesn't mean you can't share, right? Do you wanna be a good big sister or not? Then you need to share and protect the little one. And always be there for him or her." Dean looked at her and pulled both kids in a hug to give Leila a kiss on her forehead. Seth watched with amazement how Dean handled the kids. He took a couple pictures for his sister. Just because it was so cute and Dean seemed to be himself today. He wanted to have him back for good so bad. The two-tune enjoyed being with his brother who was actually the one person he loved more than anything ever before. "So I am a silly goose, okay but you did wash your hands so I can serve you two the food." Dean got up and the kids set down at the table. Seth was about to sit down when Dean grabbed his hands what caused him to blush. "Did you wash your hands?" Dean smiled and looked Seth in his warm brown eyes. He brought the hands of the slightly younger man to his nose and placed a quick kiss on his hand at the same time. Seth's eyes grew big and he felt a thousand butterflies in his stomach. 'Is this for real? Is Dean the loving, caring, chaotic and adorable man that I miss so much?' Seth tried to get his brain working again and pulled himself together. "I did. And what about you? Let me check this." Now Seth took Dean's hands in his and did the same thing. He put them under his nose and placed a very soft but still very sensual kiss onto it. Dean felt a wave of desire washing over him where Seth's lips had touched him there was his skin on fire. What was happening here? Oh my God, did Seth feel his little kiss? Why is he smiling like today was the best day ever? Dean decided that right now wasn't the time to think about the heavy. So he smiled at him and said. "Okay, finally we can all eat dinner together. But first, Seth give me your phone." The long-haired man looked at him very confused. But even before he could ask why the lunatic said with a cocky smile on his lips. "You promised Susann to send her some pics, didn't you? So let me take some where you're in it too. Did you really think I haven't realized that you've been taking pictures of us? You should have known better. So give me your phone. Now!" He took a couple pics of Connor, Leila and Seth with a sweet smile. It was such a cute sight to him. He loved to place an honest smile on Seth's face. It was the smile he would do anything for just to see it. He loved just everything about the man with the unique hairstyle. He handed Seth the phone back and said in a cherish voice. "Tell your sister, we are having a blast. And that I am the best babysitter ever!" In the moment when Dean set down between Leila and Connor something unexpected happened. Connor was so happy and he really liked Dean. He wanted to hug him and tell him thanks for the great day. But while he was leaning over he pushed accidently his plate, which fell right onto Dean. He had mac'n'cheese all over his shirt and his lap. The pretty little boy was shocked and looked horrified at Dean. "Connor, how did . . .?" Seth was a little mad at Connor but his chaotic brother had silenced him with a furious look, that said. 'Don't you dare and yell at him.' And now Seth saw why. His nephew was on the verges of tears and he felt very stupid. But Dean knew just what to do. "Uncle Dean, I am so sorry." Connor pressed the apology out between his attempts not to cry. The best babysitter ever looked the little boy in his eyes. "Hey buddy, no need for an apology. Nothing happened. Let me get you a new plate and then I am changing out of that messy shirt. Okay?" Connor stared at Dean with big eyes. "You are not mad with me?" Leila saw that her best friend was worried to get in trouble for the accident. She hopped down from her chair and hugged him around his waist. "Uncle Dee is not mad at you, Connor. Believe me. Uncle Dee never gets mad at me. Am I right?" She looked at him with hopeful eyes. Dean couldn't help it he needed to smile. Seth was surprised to see his friend so chilled out. "Dean, are you okay?" What happened here? Seth couldn't follow the whole situation anymore. "I am super, Sethie. Connor would you stop to worry, please. It's okay, really. I'm not mad." He petted Leila's head and smiled at her. "And you are right, princess. Seth would you get your nephew a new plate full of mac'n'cheese, please?" The tall man got up from his chair. "I'm going to find something to wear and change." He was about to leave the kitchen when Seth stopped him. He'd pulled him close so the kids wouldn't hear them. "Are you sure to let it be? Dean, I can punish him for his behavior. It's not a big deal." The lunatic looked at his little brother and shook his head. "No, Thie. Why would you punish him for an accident? Really, don't you think that he's beating himself up over it, is enough punishment? Did you see how scared he was? He really thought I would be mad. I must be a scary sight." The pain came back to his pretty blue eyes and Seth felt again very stupid. Dean wrapped one arm around Seth's and pulled him closer, always watching out to not get any macaroni on the dark beauty. "Are you scared of me too, Sethie?" It was a simple question but at the same time a loaded one which was delivered with so much pain in his eyes and in his voice. "No, you know I am not afraid of you. You are one of my best friends and I trust you." Dean looked Seth in his warm brown eyes and decided to drop the heavy conversation. "Okay, okay Thie. Let's drop the heavy and enjoy the night as much as we can. We have all the time to work this out if we survive this Saturday." He brushed his hand over Seth's cheek who smiled right back at him. "I am gonna go and get out of this macaroni-shirt." He walked out of the kitchen and looked in Roman's closet for something to wear.

 **Boom! Suck it up. Do you think Dean and Seth will work it out soon or will there be more events before the end?**

 **Hugs to all of you.**

 **Sorry for wrong punction, I am not a native speaker. I still know it's a lame excuse.**


	11. Chapter 11 What if we pretend?

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything or anyone except my imagination. All stories are for fun. I like to share them.**

 **So much will happen. Stay tuned for more of the boys. Cute scenes between them are coming up.**

 **Enjoy! :-***

 **Chapter 11 What if we pretend?**

Dean found basketball shorts and a shirt that usually clung really, really tight to the muscles of his big brother. As Dean came back into the kitchen he was greeted by three lovely smiles and a freshly heated up meal. "Look Connor, I am all clean and I can see you are almost done eating. Did you like the mac'n'cheese I made for you two?" Seth had to remind himself not to stare at Dean. But, oh god, he looked so freaking hot in that shorts and the shirt that showed off his firm muscles in such an innocent way. It was nerve-wracking and mind-blowing at the same time. The kids looked at Dean and said with big smiles on their faces. "It's really yummy, Uncle Dee." They finished their last little bit and asked in union. "We are finished, may we go play 'til you and uncle Seth are done eating?" Seth took charge and smiled at the kids. "Sure, go ahead but don't make too big of a mess, okay?" Now he looked at Dean who smiled at him. The architect was stunned as he saw that smile on Dean's face. It was warm, stunning and way to sexy to be ignored. "Are we gonna eat or should I dance around in circles so you can stare at me a little more?" Now the lunatic needed to snicker because Seth blushed with a deep red color on his cheeks. "Let's eat and . . . I didn't stare." He knew it was a weak attempt of an excuse. They sat down and started to eat. "I have to apologize, this is really good. I didn't know you can cook so well. But there was really no time to figure this out. We had a far too busy schedule back then." Seth was truly surprised that the man he loved was such a great cook. "That is nothing. I didn't even cook I just heated it up. But if you want I can really cook for you after we worked out everything . . . and you did stare!" Dean added the last part of the sentence with a cocky smile and desire in his eyes. Oh man, Seth was just too cute while he stared at him. He wanted to grab him and pull him as close as possible. He had to muster up all his strength to not yell at Seth why he couldn't forgive him just like that. But he stopped himself because he knew they couldn't settle this right now. Not before the match he demanded so badly. They wouldn't survive if he would tell the lovable dork why he couldn't let it go and if Seth would apologize and begged him for forgiveness. So he looked his favorite person in the eyes and spoke in a sincere voice. "Seth, let's pretend nothing happened all those months back and be just true happy friends. Let's make this night be something which will give us a reason to wanna make this work again, okay? And we should make sure the kids have as much fun as possible, too! Do you think we can do this? Please let's try, Thie. Just tonight!" The slightly smaller man took Dean's face in his hands and forced the blonde to look at him. "There is nothing I would love more. I know I have to work hard to earn your trust again and I will. So just let's make this night to be something we can built on. I know we already made sure that the kids will never forget this day. And I need to tell you something. It's about Connor. He has trouble being around strangers. Susann is protecting him way too much. You are the first stranger Connor opened up in less than a couple hours. I never saw him hugging another person except people who are family. I don't know what it is about you and kids but it's just adorable. I wanna thank you, he really needs to learn to interact with strangers. You're just the best." Dean smiled back at the two-tuned man a bit shy. But he was very happy that his dark beauty would play along and forget about all the shit that was stuck in their heads so they could have a nice evening. As Dean got up to do all the dishes, he wasn't surprised to find Seth right next to him. Just like it used to be when the two of them would watch Leila so Rome and Lis could have a long date-night. They started to talk about the weather, the football season and a lot of other things which were on their minds. The two buttheads clicked in that moment they decided to drop the heavy and pretend for tonight everything was like it always had been. But it was a heavy burden because it was a painful pretending. They couldn't quit shake off all the thoughts in the back of their heads. That lingering pain and the burning fear. In times like this Dean was thankful that he learned from an early age how to hide the truth of the emotionally state he was in. To hide his true feelings, wishes and desires. Pretending was for him as easy as breathing. Even though he knew it would haunt him in his dreams. Because you can lie to doctors, co-workers, friends and even your own family but you can never lie to your own heart. Dean knew it all. All the pain that would haunt him while he tried to find peace in a dreamless sleep that he wouldn't get. Just because life had to remind him how stupid he is. _'Why would I even dream about you kissing me? Why would you want me to be close to you? Why did I expect you would be different than everybody else? Why did I trust you? How could I fall for you so hard that I am dying on the inside when you not with me? I was a love-blinded fool to think it would mean something. Because compared to you I am nothing? The beauty and the beast. That would describes us so well or let me put it this way. The golden boy, the prince charming, the pretty future in the business and the unhinged, the lunatic, the crazy monster of the company. Yeah, that is it what it would be like. Perfection vs Trash! I know it's cruel to think so little of myself but that's how life works, honey. And I should know better than to hold on to that ray of hope you are giving me, by being here with me and play my little sick game of 'what if'. But when it comes to you I am just a lost soul that seeks comfort that only you can provide. Will we survive Saturday?'_

Dean was lost in his own self-destructive mind for a couple minutes. It went unrecognized by the two-tuned man because he had to push away all the heavy and painful thoughts in the back of his own head. He wanted to be here with his favorite person even he didn't know if there was a next time. Because Seth on the other hand didn't know how to handle this pretending if it would mean that he couldn't have it after the fight in two days. _'What if I keep hoping Dean would let me back in, let me be his friend again and maybe, just maybe I could tell my lunatic the whole truth and be rewarded with one more dream coming true. What if I would have only tonight to be with Dean like this for a long time? What if this pretending would lead to some more intimate moments than we already shared and it would scare him and his pretty dimples off for good? What if this pretending would show me in the most vicious way what I would never get to see, to call mine, to keep close to me or to have ever again? To show me how stupid I've been to leave in the first place? What if this whole thing would make it worse for him? How many times do I have to_ _break his heart before I am brave enough to tell him the truth? Will we survive Saturday?'_

They both were back from the depths of their minds when they heard a pitched scream that came from the living room. They looked at each other and let the dishes be dishes to dash off in the living room. Just to find Leila holding on to her stomach because she laughed so hard about Connor pretending to be Seth holding up his briefcase. The brown-eyed man wanted to interfere but he was stopped by his best friend. Dean put his index finger to his lips to signified Seth to stay quiet. "Hi-hi-hi . . . Connor, this is way too funny. I don't think Uncle Thie looks like this. He is not pretending this briefcase is a treasure. But let me show you how Uncle Dee behaves when he is at work." Leila stared to pace back and fore, tapping her little hand to her collar bone and pulled her eyes wide open to invoke Dean's 'crazy look'. Now Connor needed to giggle and said. "You got to be kidding me. Leila. Uncle Dee doesn't look so wired. You think I was funny but you should see your face now. Hi-hi-hi!"

Seth started to giggle but Dean busted into a whole hearted laughter. As the kids saw they weren't alone anymore Leila started to pout and Connor blushed slightly. "Connor, your show of Seth was just perfect. He always carries that damn briefcase around like it holds all the secrets to the universe. Great job, buddy!" That praise made Connor hide his face in Dean's chest as he hugged him with a quiet thanks on his small lips. But Seth smirked at Leila and told her. "Hey princess, you got that totally right with Uncle Dee looking like a total nut-job at work. That was a really good impression of him. Nice work, sweetie." Leila pulled Seth down for a kiss on his cheek and turned around to look in Dean's eyes and stuck her tongue out to him. The two kids were told they have ten minutes left to play while Dean and Seth finished the dishes. As the moment came the best babysitters ever told the little ones it was time for bed they tried a couple tricks to stay up a little longer. But unfortunately Dean knew them all. So after cleaning up, brushing their teeth and putting on their jammies they were ready to listening to Dean's good-night-story. Again, Seth was stunned by the imagination of his lunatic and how gentle Dean could be. This gentleness Dean gave to Leila and Connor. Like tugging them carefully under the covers, giving Connor a good-night-hug and the symbol off excellent which the shy boy just loved so much. Or the sweet little kiss to Leila's forehead and the soft pet on her cheek and the little, dimpled smile that crossed Dean's face as Leila placed a little kiss to his nose like she always did. It made Seth crave a gentle touch from Dean even more that he already wished for. It was ridiculous. He wanted this man so much it actually hurts. Would he find the strength in him to tell Dean why he left? Could he make it right again? While the blue eyed man tugged the kids in bed Seth snatched a couple pictures for his sister so she could sleep without worries. "Good night, you two, sleep tide and sweet dreams." Dean and Seth said to the two very sleepy kids as they left the room. The two-tune wanted to close the door all the way when Leila set up in her bed. "Uncle Thie, no . . ." She almost sniffed and the blond stopped Seth's action. "Hey sweetie, no need for tears. I am pretty sure Uncle Thie just forgot. We won't close the door all the way and we leave on the light in the hallway for you two. And we will go downstairs to make sure all the nightmares stay away from you. Do you remember what I promised you?" Seth looked at Leila with soft eyes and smiled. "I'm sorry, princess. I really just forgot. Do you remember what Uncle Dee promised you?" The little black-haired girl looked at her two favorite uncles and smiled. "I do, he said he would always make sure that no one is gonna hurt me or that something will scare me. He will fight them all off. He will be there to protect me, thank you therefore Uncle Dean. Love you. And don't worry Uncle Thie, it isn't a big deal to forget something and I love you too." Connor who listened very closely. "Leila, I don't like to sleep without a nightlight either. And tonight you don't have just Uncle Seth and Uncle Dee to protect you, you'll also have me to be right here for you. You are my best friend and I love you." The grey-eyed little girl jumped out of bed and pulled Connor in a bone-crushing hug. "Thank you, Con. I love you, too." All got down to hug each other. Dean hugged Connor, Leila hugged Seth, Seth hugged Connor, Leila pulled Dean in a tight embrace and after that she claimed her best friend's arms to hold her again. So there was the moment when Dean pulled Seth in a really tight hug and pulled him flash against his body with a dimpled smile. All the slightly younger man could do was melting in the arms of his favorite person and breathe in Dean's unique scent. He put his arms around the blonde's waist and hugged back.

 **Mwhahaha! (evil laugh) Did you like it? Reviews are like food so hit me.**

 **Hugs to all of you.**

 **Sorry for wrong punction, I am not a native speaker. I still know it's a lame excuse.**


	12. Ch 12 Big brothers and little brothers

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything or anyone except my imagination or how some people call it, sick mind.**

 **Hey readers . . . I hope I didn't let you wait too long. It was so nice after I got home from work so I finished the chappy on my balcony. Ha-ha!**

 **The fact is I need you to know that I know that the name of Roman's** **wife is Galina and the name of Roman's precious little girl is Joelle. But I don't want to interfere in any way with the real-life person Leati Joseph Anoa'i or with Jonathan Good nor with Colby Lopez and any other WWE superstar who is mentioned in this "Shield-tale". All my stories are just for fun and I don't know anything about their likes or dislikes in live, neither do I know what sexual orientation they prefer. Even though I wouldn't mind a face to face chat with them but which fan doesn't. I would just ask each one only one very special question and maybe ask for a hug. :-P Because I admit it to you . . . I like hugs. :-***

 **So enough of that . . . ENJOY this chapter!**

 **Chapter 12 Big brothers and little brothers**

It was Saturday morning and all Dean could do was thinking about the day and the night he spend with Seth and the kids. It was so good. It felt so right. How Seth smiled at him, how he hugged him, how he was just his Seth again. All of it was just like it used to be. In that moment they were soulmates again but it wasn't the day for forgiveness and comfort. But in this moment Seth came down to the couch where Dean was sleeping. He slept there because he knew Seth needed a real bed or he would get back pain and he didn't want that.

As he came down he stared at him with such a shocked expression in his eyes. Tears threating to escape them. Dean couldn't help himself. He needed to give his Seth, his everything some comfort so he pulled him in a hug and asked carefully. "Seth, what, tell me what's up? What is scaring you? Tell me, come on, man." The dark beauty smashed his head in the crack of Dean's neck. He grabbed him so tight it kind of hurt. But he didn't start talking and it made the blond very anxious. After a few sobs and sniffs Seth pulled himself a little away and began to speak. "I had a nightmare. It was horrible. I . . . I was so scared. You . . . Are you ok? Tell me, you're good, please. I got the stunt wrong and you . . . you didn't breathe anymore. Tell me, you're okay. Dean, please!" Dean pulled him back to his chest and said in a low calming voice. "Hey, hey . . . calm down, Thie. I'm good and you didn't do anything wrong. So please, Sethie calm down." He kissed the top of Seth's head.

God dammit, how was he supposed to fight him? This was fucked up. As he got to the arena this morning he started to pull out the footage of that day in June. The day, when everything changed. When his life and the last bit of trust he had in people was shattered in thousand pieces. Only the big, strong hands of his big brother held the pieces together so he wouldn't lose his mind. But he had to get himself in the 'right mood'. He had to be able to pull off this fight. It was his wish, his final chapter in the feud with Seth, for now. So he watched the footage again and again. He remembered how it felt. The moment when the chair knocked Roman out. The moment when Rome hit the mat. The way Seth was looking at him. So angry, so cold! As if everything that would come was his fault, only his. That he was the one who made Seth do this to all of them. How it felt as Seth crashed that chair over him, again and again. Ten times, twelve times or fifteen times. He didn't count again because it didn't matter. Every time the chair hit his back it felt like Seth was ripping out his heart piece by piece. Some secret punishment especially for him. What did he do? What? And then Orton turned his attention to Roman again. The face of his strong big brother turned into a mask of disappointment and pain. It was even more painful for his blue eyes to watch Roman getting hurt. He didn't deserve this treatment from their baby-brother. Dean thought so many nights about what it was that made Seth do this to Roman. Or even let Orton hurt him so bad. Seth never made a secret out of the fact he can't stand that cream puff. So many nights, so much headaches, so many nightmares for Rome which he never admitted to Dean. Even though he knew. Because he was awake and watched the change in his face and his tossing and turning and these few tears that rolled down the young Samoan's face. That picture was burned in Dean's already hurting soul forever. That was so wrong Roman being in pain because of Seth's action.

It was crucial to watch this again but it was what he needed. Dean was so caught up with the footage that he didn't realize that Rome was standing next to him for quite some time now. "Dean, why are you watching this over and over again? Come on, bro, turn it off. This is just hurting you and I don't like that you're doing this to yourself. You need to eat something. So come on, let's go." The tall Samoan placed a hand on the shoulder of his best friend. Dean almost jumped to the ceiling. As he turned to look at him. He was shocked to see the eyes of his little brother. Those eyes, these blue shades that meant so much to Roman. Why were they filled with nothing but confusion, pain and rage? "Damn, Rome. You scared the shit out of me. What's up, men? How is Lis doing?" Roman could see right through his charade. Even though he knew it was all fake, he also knew it was pointless to argue. "Lis is doing just fine. She said she is cheering for you tonight. And Leila wants to know when you'll be teaching her more about being a big sister. And by the way, why do you teach her that? Seth and I are the only ones of the three of us that have siblings. But all the things she said which you told her are so right and true. How do you know all of this? Again you surprised me, little brother. Even if I have to admit it's always in a good way. And now let's grab some food." The expression on Dean's face changed for a split second so Roman didn't see it. He faked a cocky smile and told his big brother. "I am a fast learner and picked up a lot in the last two years we spend together. Glad, I got this right." While he tried to keep that smile on his lips Roman saw it slipping away. All that pain and there was something else. But the long-haired man wasn't sure. Betrayal, fear or guilt or even all these things together? What was that in Dean's eyes? Should he ask him or just let it be? But Roman wouldn't be Roman if he didn't tell Dean that he was worried. "Dean, are you up to pull off that match? Did something happen while you were with Seth, what I need to know? Bro, I am kind of worried about you!" Dean looked his big brother in the eyes and was grateful to have a friend like the honest, young and strong Samoan. Dean threw his arms around Roman and pulled him in a bone-crushing hug. "Thanks, Rome! But don't you worry! It was just so nice to have 'our' Thie back but it brought me to my limits. That is the reason why I need to remind me that he hurt us so bad. I need to show him that he went too far but it also scares the shit out of me. But he needs to pay for what he did to us. I need to feel this pain from June again otherwise I am not able to fight him tonight. Do you think I finally lost it now?" Dean was still hugging Rome, one of his hands was fisted in the back of the young Samoans shirt. "Roman, why did he hurt us so bad? Why did he leave? Did I made him do this? Did I do something wrong? And if yes, why did he made you pay for my mistakes? Damn, I told him even more shit in my so called life than I told you. I know it's not fair but I just can't tell you all of it. Please Roman, please don't hate me! I need you to know that I do trust you a 100%. Believe me. You are my best friend, but my heart still loves that fucker. Despite for what he did!" Now the grey-eyed was confused. "Dean, why would I hate you? And would you just stop saying always 'us'. I know he hurt you more than me. It wasn't fair that he put all of his anger or whatever towards you. Seth and I knew about your past when we started. It wasn't fair of him to bring back all this crap with his wordless, back-stabbing act. I will tell you the same thing I told you back then. I don't care what you tell me and what you don't tell me. Just tell me whatever you want. I will be all ears. But as soon as you feel uncomfortable talking about stuff, just stop and say it. I will never push the issue. You should know me by now, I would never do that to you. You tell me as much as you can and I will be honored and happy that I am one of the few people you share your feelings with. So stop talking bull like that. And now let's get some food in your system. Did you have breakfast?" The blond man couldn't believe that the young Samoan was as understandable as he claimed to be. How on earth did he deserve a human being so true and caring as his big brother who always worried about all the people he loved. He needed Roman to understand that they were together in this fight. That Seth didn't betray only him. "Yes mum, I had breakfast. Damn you and that caring grey eyes of yours. And thanks again for taking care of me. But I still need to get used to this. And just so you know I will never stop saying 'us'. He fooled not me alone and I know for sure that you were very hurt that night. Just in case you forgot I don't sleep very well if I am hurt, angry or think to long about the same topic. Practically nearly every night since June. But there is something very calming about watching you sleep. It's also very revealing. Because you are talking sometimes while you dream. I know that he hurt you too. And that you thought he would and could never do that to us because we were brothers. He has to pay for making you cry in all those painful dreams. I will make him understand that this was too much to deal with. If he would have said only a word. He will pay for your pain and for mine. There isn't a difference between yours and mine. Seth should have had at least the balls to tell us. And now let it be so we can go and eat something. Because you're right, Rome. I need to eat something before the match. Shall we!" The tall long-haired man looked with blushed cheeks at his brother who cared more for his loved one's than he'd ever admit. "You knew? How much did you hear? Damn, I didn't want you to worry about me. You had enough to deal with your own pain."

The so called lunatic looked at his brother and smiled. "Would you stop it I'll always be worried about you. You, your family and of course our little weasel are the only family I have left. I know I don't show it too often but I care very deeply for all of you. And when this is all over . . ." He gestured around himself to put the whole universe around him. So Roman could understand that he didn't only meant the fight but everything that was pulling him back in this lonely, painful darkness. ". . . and done I will tell you and Thie everything about my past. But I am going to need some time for myself. And please Rome, remember the promise you gave me!"

 **It's just a fill-in chapter but otherwise I wouldn't have got the following up. What do you think?**

 **And june3law thank you . . . I claim you as my fan number 1. Thanks for your reviews .They are like food to me! It's just nice to know that someone is into the story. Special hug to you. XOXO**

 **So and to all my other readers also thank you very much. You don't know how good it feels to know that someone reads this. Hugs to you as well! XOXO**

 **And to my editor friend a thanks the next cake is on me . . . homemade of course!**


	13. Ch 13 Fight and survive

**Hey folks …. Sorry for the long wait. First thing that kept me was my trip to France and secondly I was really sick for four weeks but now I am all better and don't want you to keep waiting for the next chapters.**

 **So I need you to know I broke my back over this chapter because I found it so hard to describe a wrestling match that actually took place. So please people bear with me that it's not as it took place in WWE but as I needed it to be. I hope you can forgive me.**

 **Reviews are very welcomed. But now . . . Enjoy! Hugs to you!**

 **Chapter 13 "Fight and survive"**

After they ate something together Roman had himself excused so Dean could get his warm-up done. But the big dog also knew that his brother needed some time to himself before the match. It used to be so much fun to watch Dean and Seth fight against each other. But somehow it got a bitter taste to it now. In some ways it hurt the grey-eyed hound a lot to watch his baby brothers fight tooth to nail. It was never that way because they knew when they left the ring all of them would be family again. Best friends, brothers for life. But now the young Samoan wasn't so sure anymore. Why was it so hard for his carefree little brother to let go? Why is it so hard to reach his mind? Why couldn't he open up to anyone? Seth and he knew that Dean was in foster care for some time. But not even Seth knew how it came so far. So Roman was sure that it was some serious shit.

He was so caught up in his thoughts that he didn't pay attention where he was going. And all of a sudden he bumped into something or someone. As his eyes focused on the target he was surprised. "Seth, what are you doing here? You're too far away from your side of the arena. Don't get us all in even more trouble." He whispered in the ear of his baby brother. The architect looked around to check if there was a camera close by. "Rome, please . . . could we talk for a second? Please!" His pretty brown eyes were begging real hard and the young Samoan saw that he was fighting a lot of emotions. He nodded slightly and pulled Seth in his locker room. "You're not sharing it with Dean today? Why? Is he okay?" The reason was clear to everyone except their little brother. Roman needed to snicker. "What do you think? He wants to be alone. This is going to be one of the hardest fights in his life. You should know that! Because you are supposed to know him best. At least that is what he keeps telling me. That you know more about him than I do. So what do you think why he wants to be by himself. This is hurting him and I know it's hurting you too." The younger man looked at him with such a sad expression that the young Samoan almost felt guilty. "But as far as you know he is fine. Yeah? Nothing strange, even for him?" Seth needed to know, the day with Dean was just so good and it felt so right. The way his lunatic hugged him, helped him with the kids and was just the man he fell in love with even if no one knew yet. "Seth, what do you want? Come on, bro! Don't you think this day will be hard enough for all of us? So tell me what you want?" The brown-eyed man had tears in his eyes and wanted to leave. The two-tuned man took a deep breath and looked in the grey eyes of his big brother. "Does he really think it's his fault? Does he really think he made me go behind your backs?" The grey-eyed Samoan wondered where this came from. Why did Seth know that all of a sudden? He always made sure not to tell him Dean's true feelings. Roman studied his little brother very closely. "Why would you think that Dean thinks it is his fault? Sethie, this is just a storyline. We both know it's a tough one for him, but . . ." Seth started to shake his head franticly and yelled at his big brother to make him understand. So he wouldn't hurt him again because he had to come up with some stupid lies. "Rome, stop. Please, I don't want to make anybody hurt anymore. I was looking for Dee and you earlier today. I . . . I heard the two of you. I heard him. Tell me, it's not what he really believes, please, big brother, please." The taller man swallowed audibly and pulled Seth who was close to tears in his arms. "Hey Thie, calm down little one. I won't tell you because you don't want to hear the truth and I can't lie about him anymore. I'll have to wait until you two are done tonight and then I can try to pick up the pieces of him and of the two of us. Sethie, this is your fight, his's and yours. And as much as it pains me there is nothing, absolutely nothing I can do to help my little brothers. Seth, you have to make it through the match by yourself just like Dee. But when we are backstage again I will be there for you. So calm down and go and start your warm -up. I don't think Dean's going to go easy on you." The tow-tuned man pressed Romans body for quite some time really hard to his own and tried to relax. He knew that this match with his lunatic will be war and he would take and bear everything what Dean would throw at him. Roman was right after this war they could start to fix things.

-The match-

The crowd was hot and really excited to see this war. They would cheer for the lunatic and boo for the 'sell out'. This match was rough on both of them. Seth apologized to his brother over and over again. Dean grunted after Seth threw him from the top turn buckle to the ground. He didn't want to go further anymore. This was too much. Every time Seth got close enough he would talk to him. Just like right now. "Sorry Dee, I am sorry! Please you have to get up. We still have ring action for the next fifteen minutes. Are you okay? Tell me!" As he pulled Dean of the fucking floor he whispered all those toxic words in the ear of the man with the unruly hair. Occasionally Seth would let his lips brush over Dean's cheek and he would hold him all so gently. The lunatic was done and started to fight. Recalled all the pic's he watched over and over before this match started. His big brother's pain and Seth's indescribable anger. He needed to pay for pulling this shit on them. The next five minutes were pure hell for Seth. Punches, head butts, slams . . . Dean pulled off the show of his life. This turning point in the match screwed Seth over because he looked in the saddest blue shades he had ever seen. After a vicious cloth line the ninja was laying in the middle of the ring. He waited for Dean to cover him. Because he couldn't stand it anymore to look in his eyes. They were nothing like they were two days ago. What did Roman mean as he said? **'** _Dee is torturing himself, so he will be able to pull off this fight.'_ The long-haired ninja saw so much pain and something that could be compared with tears.

The lunatic covered Seth only to pull him off the mat by the two count. And he whispered without a warning. "Stop repeating you're sorry. It won't help you today!" When Dean saw the fear in the eyes of his one and only everything. He felt like crying. But then he remembered this day in June. "No, you're not sorry. You don't know the true meaning of being sorry. You betrayed us! And I . . ." With every spoken word the volume in Dean's voice increased. He trough Seth in the turnbuckle and grabbed his head in a vicious hold. "And I loved you!" Seth froze for a moment. Then he pulled his left knee up to loosen the hold Dean applied. The blonde's reaction was just perfect. He grabbed his own stomach and stumbled backwards. Now the architect of a dream was on the move. He climbed up on the top rope and flew with a cross body in the direction of the crazy spirit. Dean caught Seth in midair so all the weight was on his back. The self-called ninja moved to his head and asked in a shaky voice. "Dee, are you okay? Please . . . Dean. Please, let's stop! I am sorry, you got to believe me." Dean heard Seth but he had to focus on the ref. 1 . . . 2 . . . Shoulders up. The blonde drove his head to the ninja's forehead. He pretended that he was still hurting from the top-rope collision with Seth. So the lunatic started to roll himself to the place where they needed to be. He didn't look back to the two-tuned man because he would stop it right there just for Seth's sake.

But this was his fight, his chapter, his closure. He needed this, he needed this time, and he needed to think. To think a lot. But not right now.

The lunatic rolled himself out of the ring. Still pretending to be in pain. Now he looked if Thie followed him. Seth came from the other side and attempted to throw Dean in the ring-post. But like they had practiced last Sunday, the one with the broken mind grabbed his arm and spun him around that he crashed in the announce-table. The blonde rolled back in the ring to brake the 10 count. Nobody who was at the ring-side knew about what was about to happen. Just Seth, Kane, Steph, J&J, Rome and Dean himself. So everybody was surprised when 'the future of the WWE' got back in the ring with a chair in hand. The two men locked eyes for a split second. Seth didn't want to do this. But . . . but he signed a fucking contract. "I loved you!" Dean whispered those dreadful words again just as Seth lifted the chair to hit it over his former team mate's head.

But again just like in old times their ring-chemistry between those two was something else. Dean grabbed the chair as the two-tuned was about to smash it over his head. In that moment the lunatic started the show for the fans. "Again!" He yelled so the camera mic could pick it up. "Again you coward. You just can't beat me without any help. Am I such a big threat to you? I am, am I? Because you know I am better. And again you're the traitor!"

Now Seth's knee landed in Dean's face. He stumbled backwards and fell out of the ring. The smart ninja picked up the pace and launched himself over the top rope to lay out Dean. They crashed in the announce table again. And just like last time Dean took the most. Seth didn't understand. He thought his brother wanted to hurt him with this match. But the lunatic protected him from the worst. He didn't feel like they were fighting for 15 minutes already. Now it was time, the ref counted up to 8 and Dean dragged him on top of the table. Like they had agreed the blonde would try 'dirty deeds' which Seth would turn into a 'pedigree'. The ref called for the bell. He said the winner was S. R. because of a count out. The unstable man tried to get up and gave the ninja a sign to give him the first 'peace of mind'. So Seth jumped to the spanish announce table to get enough height. Three steps back and up in the air to connect with Dean's head on the table.

Kane had left his chair at ringside. Just to join the action. He smiled his evil smile to the architect and nodded his approval. He revealed some cinder blocks which were hidden under a little 'table'. All of a sudden Seth turned pale and Dean who tried to get up saw this. He signified Kane to come closer. The big red machine did as he was told and picked up the unhinged to move him to his destiny. He talked loudly trash to Dean but as he got real close he wanted to know if he was still sure. "Are you okay? You still want to pull this trough?" Dean rolled his eyes. "Yes, dammit! Make him mad! His hesitation is not a good thing for this stunt. Make him mad!"

This was all Dean said. Kane looked at Seth and knew immediately what Dean meant. He pulled the blonde further to the blocks to place him there! "Come on Seth! Are you the man you claim to be? Think of all the chances you've been given by the authority. Are you worth the effort?"

This were the right words. Dean knew it. He needed to smile. Kane just knew how to push Seth's buttons and he loved to do it. But right now he wasn't so sure. The architect got real mad at Kane. 'How dare he doubted that I am worth it?' Maybe he wasn't as big and scary as Kane or Taker but he had it. And because he was hurt in his ego and his pride. He took off in the air without looking out for his target. In the moment his feet left the table he looked and it hit him like a tone of cinder blocks. 'Fuck Dean!' The head of the lunatic fringe was a bit too high up and the architect had only a little time to do some fixing. 'Dammit. No Dean, I didn't mean to. It was because I got mad at Kane.' These thoughts filled Seth's mind. 'How could I let myself be carried away by the words of the big red machine? For god sake's this is Dean!' But it was too late. And in that moment his boot hit Dean a little bit too far down, close to his neck. As the architect felt the ground underneath his feet he stumbled back and looked kind of shocked at Dean. The lunatic barely moved and now even the big red monster wasn't so sure anymore. 'Was it really a good idea to make Seth mad?' But they had to play their parts. So Kane walked over to the man who was standing kind of holding on to the table he just had jumped off. He petted the shoulder of the future of the company and raised his arm in the air. The big red machine placed the WWE WHC-belt on Seth's shoulder who took it in his other hand to raise it over his head, still starring at the unmoving body of Dean. And now he felt a strong fist in the back of his neck. Roman punched Kane in the face and he played along so well. The red monster stumbled a couple steps back and dropped to the floor pretending to be knocked out. The big dog turned around with furious eyes. He grabbed the stunned Seth by his hair and punched him a couple time real hard. "Did you lose your mind? You went too far! . . . Somebody get the meds over here!" The young Samoan yelled. Seth was sitting near the ring post and had a hard time hiding his tears. The grey-eyed hound moved closer to Dean who was now surrounded by a lot of meds. The big red monster pulled Seth to his feet and walked back to the ramp with him where he pulled up the architects arm with the belt in hand in the air. Dean was strapped to a stretcher still barely moving and his big brother was walking right behind him all the way to the ambulance. In the moment the cameras went off air Seth was standing right next to Roman and together they watched how their best friend was carted away. Seth had to hold on to his big, strong brother as the meds closed the doors. "Don't touch me right now. Why didn't you pay attention? What happened? Fuck Seth, this was Dean not some asshole that you wanted to screw over. And you know what, he knew this would happen. Dee said to me 'Do you feel the pain now, Thie? Does it hurt to see me like this? Remember the feeling because I am feeling like this since June!' Quote finished. He told me to tell in case he couldn't!" Now both of them sank to their knees and tried to hide the pain they felt.

 **So what do you think was the match too far from the truth? I hope it was not too off. Like I said I had a really hard time to get it done.**

 **Do you think Dean protected Seth during the match from physical pain because he knew the words would hurt him a lot more. I believe emotional pain is far worse than physical pain.**

 **So let's move to the next chappy.**


	14. Chapter 14 Truth and the real truth

**So now Roman and Seth get to know why Dean changed into a hollow shell of his own self. But will this be all what made him change?**

 **Start reading and find out! Enjoy!**

 **Hugs to all of you.**

 **Chapter 14 "Truth and the real truth"**

Roman and Seth arrived at the arena three days after the match. They were emotionally hurt by this match as much as Dean was hurt physically. It was hard for them to see him on the stretcher without any light in his beautiful eyes. The young Samoan started to 'fight' with Seth shortly before Dean was placed on the stretcher and he hit him for real a couple times. He couldn't believe that Seth was angry at Kane and therefore he jumped with full speed. They had followed Dean in the hospital. Both of them wanted to make sure it wasn't as bad as it seemed. But the doctor told them that Dean had suffered a severe concussion, a big bruise on the left side of his face and probably a neck injury. That was the reason why he needed to be put in an artificial coma for the next two days. The doc explained that Dean supposedly held his head in a wrong angle or the person who 'stomped' him too far in the back of his head. Maybe both at the same time. The medics didn't want to risk his health to let him wake up by himself. They would make him wake up at their speed, starting tomorrow. He needed to rest now. The young men weren't allowed to see him. What made it even worse for his brothers! Seth was choked up as he saw the footage of his 'crime'. He felt lower than shit. He cried himself to sleep in Roman's arms. The bigger man didn't say a single word. He couldn't even look him in the eyes. Roman didn't trust his feelings. All he wanted was revenge for his suffering brother. But he also wanted to keep his promise. Even if he wanted nothing more than to punch all the crap out of Seth, that he used for his lame excuses.

They walked to the meeting room where all of them would meet to talk about the action for the next month, a month without Dean. As they strolled by Kane and Joey, Seth heard something unbelievable. He turned back around and grabbed Joey's shoulder. "Joey, what did you just say? I am not sure if I heard right." Joey looked at his friend and confirmed. "I was just saying to Kane that Ambrose is absolutely irresponsible and out of his mind for checking himself out of the hospital after only three days. He must be still in an awful lot of pain. He might be hard-headed but there is no way that he's recovered already." Kane could see that the faces of Roman and Seth turned pale and they seemed to be in some kind of shock. "But I was about to tell Joey that he probably didn't have any other choice because of the funeral tomorrow." As soon as he said that he regretted it. It was written on both men's faces that they didn't know about the funeral. The young Samoan found his voice first and asked. "Funeral, what Funeral? Kane come on, what are you talking about?" His grey eyes were a begging plea. The big, sometimes scary looking guy was about to answer when they all heard the clicking sound of some high heels. Steph silenced Kane with a stern look and said in a warm voice. "Roman. Seth. Would you two follow me in my office, please?" She turned to Hunter who was standing next to her. "I'll talk to them. Would you start the monthly meeting without us? I can fill them in what will be important for them." Hunter gave her a quick kiss on the cheek and said. "Thanks honey, you know I don't like this kind of conversations. You are the best for doing that for me. Love you. I'll let someone tape the meeting so you guys will know, what will be going on next month." By his last sentence he looked at the two long-haired men. He felt so sorry for them. He knew how hard it was to watch a friend struggle and not being able to help. In his mind he wished them good luck.

The two stunned men followed the beautiful woman in her office. As Steph turned around her face was smooth and her eyes were caring. "Actually I am a bit surprised that he hasn't told you two, what had happen. Dean's mother passed away! She had been in a hospital for the last three weeks." Seth had to grab Roman's arm so he wouldn't fall onto the ground. He felt sick and the room started to spin. The larger man held him upright. "That SOB . . . that's what is fucking going on. He probably didn't expect that it would affect him so much." The brown-eyed man looked up to his big brother. "Rome, how can you say that it has any effect on him? You know what she fucking did to him and what happened after she left him. He is probably the happiest man alive now." His big brother cut him off with a scary glare. "Seth, do you hear yourself right now? She is still the woman who gave birth to him. There is a connection between him and her that even he can't deny. And you're forgetting that he really is the last one who is left of his family now. Even if he didn't felt as connected with his blood family as he should, he is all alone now." He had to calm down a bit and take a breath so he wouldn't yell the next words. "Here we go again. He is going to do something stupid I can feel it. Stephanie, I need a couple days off. I have to look out for him. But there is something else I would like to know, what did you mean you were surprised that he didn't tell us?" Seth, who was thinking hard about what Roman had said, turned to the pretty brunette to hear her answer. His mind was running like a wild horse. Steph leant on the desk behind her and took a deep breath. "I asked him to do so. I demanded it. I even ordered him to do it. I told him that he would feel better if he told it at least one of you. That he didn't have to be in that mess all by himself. I don't know any details about his childhood. But that he didn't want to talk about it was pretty obvious. There was a lot of pain in his eyes every time someone reminded him of the past. Roman, of course I'll give you some time off. Make sure that he doesn't do anything he is going to regret for the rest of his life, please. Dean is one of the good guys the world needs so bad."

Seth tugged on Roman's arm, who was starting to get out of the office. "Do you think I would be a help to look out for him?" He asked very carefully because he was scared of the answer. His big brother gave him a questioning look. "What do you think, Seth? Sorry for saying this, the hard way, man. But partly you are the reason why he crushed and burned. The family he truly loved was taken away from him by you. The brothers he would have died for, still would and always will. Just because you kept quiet. You knew that it was very hard for him to trust us. But you took that delicate piece of glass and stomped it into the ground. Seth, you of all people should have known that he wouldn't recover from this backstabbing act without any kind of preparation. He still loves you. He would never do anything to really get you upset. Or to hurt you. No matter how much it hurts his own soul. Yet alone you're still the only person I know who can reach him in one of his furies. You just need to look, really look him into his eyes and he is as sweet as he can be." The giant looked to the young woman who was his boss and asked. "You don't mind if I take him with me, don't you? I may hold Dean down but I can't calm him down." Stephanie shook her head and said in a warm sweet voice. "Of course not. I've seen Seth working his magic. It is fucking incredible. But Seth do you really want that? You know he might snap at you." The young two-tuned man looked at her with a focused mind. "We've been there, we've done that. I have Rome to hold him in one of his steel cage hugs and then I can talk to him without getting hurt! I want to help him. I need to be there for him." He shot a wink to the young Samoan who nodded. Steph pulled out two tickets to Dean's hometown where the funeral would take place. "Flight and hotel are booked for you. Just get your things in order and pack some stuff. I ordered a bouquet of flowers for the funeral with our expression of condolences. I want you to take it there. And now get going. We will discuss everything else when you guys get back."

 **So, my editor friend is really helping me today. Even she still doesn't understand where all of this is coming from. But I told her today I sometimes don't know it myself. What do you think of my story so far? Thanks for reading!**

 **Tixx**


	15. Chapter 15 Some secrets

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything or anyone except my imagination or how some people call it - sick mind. I think I need to say it again. Just for fun!**

 **Hey readers, here is the treat we got going for you! My friend and I are worn out after discussing spelling-mistakes, sentence structure and style. Sometimes we just rub each** **other the wrong way but after a brief moment and dead silence we are all good and mostly need to laugh.**

 **Enjoy the treat!**

 **Chapter 15 "Some secrets"**

The service for Dean's mother was quite simple but very elegant in its own way. Dean was sitting on the left side on a bench all by himself. Behind him on the left side there were friends and co-workers of his mum and all the way in the back there were two people Dean didn't see at all. The members of his stepfather's family were sitting on the right side. All of them looked disgusted and annoyed. As if the funeral was a fucking pain in the ass duty. Dean has never seen more than the half of them. The few people he knew already started to make him feel uneasy and they haven't even said one word. He started to get angry in the minute he got here and saw his stepfather. He thought he had buried that anger a long time ago. But he wasn't so sure anymore. The service was almost over and it was time to put his mother to rest in peace. That's when things got a little out of hand. "Dean, would you like to say some last words to your beloved mother?" The reverend asked in a peaceful voice. 'Beloved!' Dean couldn't believe what he heard, as if she ever loved him. "I rather don't." That's all he pressed out between his lips. He tried hard not to let his anger control him. "Dean, she was your mother, for god's sake. Don't you think she deserves some last words from her son? Don't be the spoiled brat I think you are and always has been. So pull yourself together and behave. Maybe you should say a prayer that helps to deal with the pain." A man with grey hair, a smug smile around his lips and hateful desire in his eyes said all those things to Dean. No, he couldn't deal with it anymore. "You . . . you of all people tell me about dealing with pain, you ass." He didn't want to taint the funeral hall with blood so he stormed out of it without noticing a confused Seth and irritated Roman in one of the last benches. The two long-haired men looked at each other with questioning eyes. They got up from there seated positions and followed Dean with some distance.

He walked across the graveyard in a pattern that didn't make any sense to his brothers who still followed him. Until they finally saw that Dean was crying, really hard. And all of a sudden he stopped in front of a grave. Dean looked up to the sky and started to scream. "Why, why did you leave me in this fucking shit? You said we will always be together! Why can I see your face again? Why do I dream about you again? You did it, Dylan . . . you finally did it. You made your brother cry. Just because I can see now I'm all alone. There is no family left. If we even could call us that. Our family broke apart, the minute mum meet that sadistic bastard. The other family I had, broke apart because I can't swallow my damn pride and one of my brothers had hurt me beyond words could ever tell. And this fuck of a stepfather really told me to pray. To pray! That idiotic asshole. As if praying will take away this fucking crucial pain. I can't take that anymore." He fell on his knees in front of a grave and covered his face with his hands. An elder lady walked towards him and gave him a look of hatred. "Ambrose would stop calling my grateful son such nasty names. He was a good husband and a nice father to you. Get over it already! Would you mind and stop your inappropriate behavior? It's your mother's funeral." Dean's eyes turned crazy and he stood up with anger written all over his face.

"You're telling me to lie and pay one's last respects to that cheap excuse of a mother. You got to be kidding me. And don't give me the shit about your son. All of you knew what he did to us. To me and Dylan. And that my so called mother didn't give a shit about us as long as she wouldn't be alone. As long as Maxwell fucked her nice and hard, she was happy. No matter how much he had beaten us. All of you knew what had happened but no one wanted to help or cared about us. We were inconvenient." The two of them were now surrounded by the funeral party. The man with slightly grey hair and big hands walked closer to them and looked Dean straight in the eyes. "Dean, you ungrateful bastard. I swear, if you don't apologize to my mother I will spank you." Dean starred at that man in disbelieve. "Oh, you would love to get your filthy hands on me again, wouldn't you? Just to enjoy some power, you low-life." He turned his attention to the audience and scoffed. "Do you want me to remind you what happened? Or maybe we should just show you what he did to Dylan. What do you think, asshole? Can you do it again, scumbag? But you should know by now, I'm not a scared little 11-year old anymore. So bring it on. Fair warning though I will fight back!"

Seth and Roman looked at each other. "He is going to do something very stupid, we have to stop him!" That was all the younger man could think about. He pulled Rome's ear down to his lips and whispered. "Sneak behind him and hold him tight. I will try to get through to him. But you need to know I've never ever seen him this angry and broken." The taller man nodded, tilted his head a bit and spoke softly in his little brother's ear. "Me neither. It looks like he really wants to kill that Maxwell-dude. We have to hurry! Just speak softly and look like you care about him." Seth let go of his big brother and let him get into position. Seth didn't need to pretend to care he did care for his brothers. As soon as he could see that Rome was close he started walking towards the scene.

Dean was still talking in rage to that arrogant looking guy that licked his lips every time he caught Dean's glace. "Dean-o, come on, baby-boy." Roman and Seth froze in their movements as they heard that. The man with the cocky grin on his face called Dean 'baby-boy', as if he was some kind of lover to him. They both were disgusted and now they kind of guessed why their brother was so mad. Maxwell walked a bit closer to Dean who didn't step back an inch. He just starred in anger and rage at that man who was his worst nightmare. The grey-haired man started talking again without caring about their audience. "Don't tell me you two brats didn't like it. You always begged me to hit you harder and more. Did you forget that, Dean-o?" The disgusting man asked Dean with a cocky smile on his lips. Dean drew a deep breath and he spoke in such a calm emotionless voice that it scared everyone. "I didn't forget. How could I? But you got it all wrong. I didn't ask for more because I liked it. I did it so you would be too tired to hurt Dylan so much. You knew he was more vulnerable than me. I could handle that. But maybe it is your turn for some honesty. You loved it to beat the shit out of me even more than you loved to insult Dylan. Didn't you? You got off every time I let you have it your way." His brothers froze again. Now Roman had to remind himself that he was here to help his brother to stay away from serious trouble. That it wouldn't help Dean if the two of them killed that fucking piece of shit that brought back Dean all the painful memories of his childhood. He looked over to Seth and saw that he was fighting the same fight. As their eyes met they knew that Dean didn't tell them all of his childhood traumas and reasons for him to end up in a foster care. Maxwell snickered and thought back of the days he was truly satisfied because of the young men in front of him. "I have to admit, you were the best, Dean. I still think about you a lot. You could handle more pain than any other one that I had and just so you know. THAT day I really thought it was you at the beginning. And then I just couldn't stop. But don't worry I didn't have as much fun as I had with you later that night."

Again a dirty laugh and that arrogance in his voice!

Now the blue-eyed man lost it. He started throwing some punches at Max. He met his jaw straight on and really hard a couple times. Shortly after that he felt like he was trapped in a steal cage. He looked down on his body and saw the familiar arms of his big brother. "Let me go, Rome. Please that son of a bitch is the reason for all my fears and all my failures. I got to kill him. I hate him so much! He murdered Dylan and all of them knew it. But nobody gave a damn. Roman, please, please just let me kill him and I'll do whatever you want. Please!" He started to beg screamingly but he also tried to free himself. Roman was surprised how strong Dean was. Anger was really some kind of weapon. Now he understood why his brother demanded that promise from him earlier this week. But then all of a sudden all of his strength was gone. It floated out of him as he heard that voice. His voice. The most beautiful thing he'd ever heard. His name on those sweet lips. "Dean, calm down, Dean please. Look at me. You're not alone. You have to stop this. You're only hurting yourself." Seth cupped Dean's face and looked into the eyes of the man he never wanted to lose. "And I know you don't want to cause Rome any pain." It was unfair to play this card but Seth needed him to calm down. He was so worried about Dean's health. He was still healing from the severe concussion. Seth was scared. "You know he would help you to kill that bastard. Could you live with that? Dean, look at me ...!" Seth waited a moment to choose his next words carefully and for Dean to look him in the eyes. "Look at me, WE are here to be there for you. WE won't let you down. I know you don't trust me anymore. But you got to believe me, even if it's just for today when I say, I will be here for you. And Rome will be there too. WE love you, Dean. WE will take care of you and watch out for each other like we used to do!" His brown orbs locked with Dean's blue shades. Roman looked at his two baby-brothers and saw that Seth eyes were filled with love, warmth, care and some worries. And Dean's mysterious blue one's showed signs of confusion, pain, anger and guilt. Did his best friend believe Seth or not? He couldn't tell even if his life would depend on it. All that pain and that anger and this guilt! Why did he feel guilty? What for? Dean seemed like he tried to make up his mind and thought for a minute. His brothers knew he was talking to himself in his mind to lay out the pros and cons.

At that moment Roman and Seth got a closer look of the grave. They were shocked to see who that grave belonged to.

 **Thanks to all my readers and a special thanks to my editor friend. We had a nice get together with our mums for coffee and great cake!**

 **Tell me if you were surprised to get to know Dean's messed up family! Don't let your mind fool you. There is more coming! The next chapter will be a tough one so give me some time to wrap it up!**

 **Thanks talk to you soon!**

 **Tixx**


	16. Chapter 16 Two of his Kind

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything or anyone except my imagination or how some people call it, sick mind. I think I need to say it again. Just for fun!**

 **I am so sorry this was taking so long. First off all 'Happy new year to all of you!' I was breaking my back over the end of this chappy. I hope they are as shaken and emotional as I wanted them to be.**

 **But now enjoy!**

 **Chapter 16 Two of his kind**

On the tombstone was written:

 **Dylan Ambrose**

Beloved son and brother

 *** December 7, 1985**

† **June 15, 1997**

Seth and Roman looked at each other. The grey-eyed giant asked in shock. "Did you see the date of birth? What is that supposed to mean? Do you know anything about that?" Seth shook his head. "Holy crab, do you know what that means, big guy? All that sayings about 'u made your brother cry', 'we' and 'us'. Dean has to be a twin. Can you believe that there were two of his kinds? I didn't know it. Not a tiny bit." All of a sudden Seth realized what he had done to Dean. He put him through the worst with his wordless backstabbing act. He let him lose a brother again and made him relive the death of his own brother, of his twin brother.

But in the next moment his eyes were all over Dean. Because he was ripped out of his thoughts when he heard his big brother exhale loudly and calling Dean's name. "Dee, Dee! Come on, man. What's wrong? Tell me, Dean. Say something!" Roman was scared for Dean. What was happing? Dean went slack in his arms and he really had to hold him now so he wouldn't fall onto the floor.

The tall man saw that his little brother turned white and pulled out his cell to call an ambulance. Roman shifted Dean very carefully into his arms to carry him bridal style and started walking towards the big Iron Gate that was the entrance and the exit of the graveyard. He pressed his best friend as close as possible to his chest and told him to fucking stop it. "Dean, I swear, if you die in my arms I am going to kill you. You can't do this to us. Not like that. Not with all the questions you left us with. I don't care if I have to beat it out of your fucking mouth but Dee, you owe us an explanation. Who is that Maxwell-dude? What were you talking about being beaten up...? And who the hell is that kid in the grave?" Roman wasn't done being mad at Dean for losing consciousness in his arms. But now he felt Seth's arms wrapping around both of them and he started to calm down in an instant. His little brother wasn't as calm as his smooth voice was trying to make him believe. "Rome, look at me. Calm down, everything is going to be okay. The ambulance will be here any minute. Dean will get all better and then we can talk. So stop. He is fine. You hold him tight and he is nice and warm so we're all good." Seth brushed very carefully through Dean's unruly hair and stroke Roman's cheek all so gently. He also wiped the blood from Dean's nose. Roman looked at his baby brother and saw nothing but pure love for both of them and a lot of worries. Seth was crying by the time the ambulance arrived. _'This was wrong. This was so fucking wrong. I should be the one in so much pain.'_ That was all Seth could think about. This whole mess was his fault.

The paramedic asked them what happened. The younger man tried to fill him in.

"He . . . his name . . ." Seth cried so hard that he couldn't speak and his whole body was shaking. He looked with big lost eyes at Roman who pulled him to his chest and stroke his back after he had placed Dean carefully on the stretcher. "This is Dean Ambrose. We were here to attend the funeral of his mother. He had a heated argument with one of the funeral guests and dropped all of a sudden in my arms. But he also was hospitalized four days ago with a server concussion and a possible neck injury after a wrestling match. He was earlier bleeding from his nose. Is there anything else you need to know?" The paramedic looked at Roman to progress all the information. "That should do it. Does he have an insurance card? We are going to take him to the Angel Falls Hospital. But I can't take either one of you for a ride. You . . ." He pointed at Seth. "I would have to worry too much that you could lose consciousness too but you're also in no condition to drive by yourself. So I suggest that you just follow us. We need you to be close by just in case. Is there any family member we need to call? Do . . . you want me to give him something to calm down?" The medic looked at Seth again and turned his head to the really tall young man holding the other in his arms. The paramedic buckled Dean to the stretcher. He gave him an IV with some liquid and checked his vitals again. Seth was still shaking really hard and grabbed Rome really tight. He looked up to his big brother and shook his head franticly. The young Samoan understood perfectly well. "No thanks. I will take care of my little brother. We will take our car and follow you. No, there is no family member we need to call. There are no more relatives left. We are his family, his brothers. Please take good care of Dean for us. He is the glue that keeps us together." The medic nodded and closed the door of the vehicle so they could get the patient to the hospital. The two-tuned man took a deep breath of relief that his brother didn't let the medic cloud his mind with some medications. But he was also moved by Roman's words and he knew his big brother was so damn right. "Th. . . Thank you, Rome. Thanks." Seth told himself that he needed to calm down. He needed his mind as strong and as clear as possible. He still held his big brother very tight because he was scared, scared of what he was about to tell his big brother and scared for Dean. He couldn't leave them, he just couldn't . . . not like this. Roman saw that his baby brother was scared. So he pulled him even closer and told him. "Hey, hey . . . no thanks needed but you need to calm down, please. We have enough to worry about, okay! Are you able to walk or should I carry you to the car?" Roman wasn't so sure why Seth was so shaken up. But he knew his other best friend so well that he was certain that his baby brother just needed a moment to figure out how he was going to tell him what's scaring him so much. The man with the beautiful brown eyes looked up und was lost in the caring glace of his brother. "If I can hold on to you I am good to walk. We should go. I don't want him to be all by himself when he wakes up. But on the way to the hospital I need to tell you something and I would appreciated it if you would let me finish before you say something. Can you do that, Rome?" The two-tuned man wasn't sure if he was up for this. All he could think about was what he had put Dean through. He left 'The Shield' because he was a coward who was too proud to admit that he fell in love with one of his best friends. This was too much. ' _How could I ask for Dean's forgiveness when I hurt him so much, more than anyone?'_

Seth was rubbing his thighs with his sweaty hands while he was sitting in the passenger seat. He was nervous, scared and unable to find the words he was looking for to tell Roman what was on his mind.

' _How would he react? Would he hate me? That I broke on of the greatest groups' in sports entertainment for his selfish reasons? Would he hate me for not being honest with the only two men who I trust in this shark-tank-business? Would Roman pity me or tell me to fuck off?'_ The younger man was so scared to destroy even more in this brotherhood than he already had. His thoughts were all over his mind.

Dean's health! Dean's past? Would Dean find forgiveness in his heart for Seth when he finally knows the real truth? Not all the lame excuses he had told him all the times before.

Roman saw that his little brother was thinking really hard how to start this conversation. He looked scared to Roman, maybe even humbled. ' _What wanted Seth to tell him? Was it so bad? Did he think there was anything he couldn't tell me?'_ The young Samoan was in full big brother mode. He loved his family and he loves his friends who became so fast and so easy brothers. Roman and his relatives considered Seth and Dean to be part of the family ever since the long-haired man introduced them. The big brother mode and the worries for Dean overtook him so he pulled the car to the right next to the curb. Seth starred at disbelieve at his brother. "Rome, what you doing we gotta catch up with the ambulance. I want to be at the hospital with him so he knows we are keeping our word." But Roman ignored his request and pulled his little brother in a hug. It was a tight hug and he rubbed small circles on the back of the brown-eyed man. "Thie, would you please calm down? We will be at Dean's side in a couple minutes. But I want you to know you can tell me anything and it won't change a thing between us. I will always be there for you and love you, no matter what. You are my 'Uce'! So just spill it already." Now it was Seth's turn to be overwhelmed his big brother was in teddy-bear mode! He loved the tall Samoan for taking care of all of his loved one's. "Thank you, Rome! Thank you so much for always taking care of us! Let me take a breath and you start driving again. These are the conditions so I will start talking. And you promise me you won't interrupt me! Yes?" The pretty man looked with a big smile at his brother and hugged him back tightly. "Love you, Rome! You know that, don't you?" Roman pressed his little brother close to his chest and then he pulled away to start the car again smiling at him. "I know Thie, I know! And you're still a sly little weasel as usually. Making the best deals for yourself?" The grey-eyed hound wanted to break the tension with this joke. He didn't know that Seth thought he was being serious.

But just like Seth promised he started to talk. "Like you just said I know how to make good deals and I keep the best for myself!" Roman wanted to make clear that he was joking but his brother looked at him with such narrowed eyes that he remembered he was supposed to be quieted and not to interrupt him. The look on his sad little brothers face made him shut his mouth. Seth was glad that his big teddy-bear understood that he needed silence to get all of this off his chest. So he continued to talk in a shaky voice. "The best deal, uh . . . turned out to be my biggest mistake. I thought it would take all the pain away and let my live my dream of being the champ. Man, I was so wrong! I left . . . I broke the shield because I was a selfish coward. I fell hard. So hard for him. I didn't mean to cause all this pain for us. I fell in love with Dean and there was nothing I could do about it. It got so bad that I started to dream about him and wished that I would muster up the courage to tell him so we could try or I would have to get over it. It was so bad it was hurting me. I always started to pick fights with everyone. You. Him. Authority. I didn't care. I thought if I wouldn't be so close to him those feelings would go away. But they didn't and now he wouldn't even talk to me anymore and the pain in his pretty blue eyes. I was not worth it. I broke a great sports group and destroyed our brotherhood for nothing. I'm still madly in love with him. And I miss my big brothers like hell. What is it worth of being champion if there is no one who would celebrate with me? I hated the nights without you two and not being able to talk to you and him, it was the worst! Please Rome, don't hate me! Don't hate me for wrecking us for such selfish reasons. I thought it would be better if I didn't scare him away with my unexpected feelings for him. I thought I was doing the right thing to protect all of us. I'm sorry. Please don't hate me!" The smaller man was crying hard by the time he was done. The two long-haired men arrived at the parking lot at the hospital in this moment. Roman killed the engine and pulled Seth close to hug him tightly. The tall man let out an audible sigh and petted Seth's head that was resting on his shoulder. "Finally, you are honest with yourself. And let me tell you this is nothing I would hate you for. Actually I am proud of you for admitting it. I was just kidding when I talked about your 'best deals'. Love you bro. We will work it out, I promise. But now let's head to our little wild card. So we will proof to him that WE will keep our promises."

This was all Seth needed to hear. He was so relieved and happy that Roman wasn't mad and wouldn't hate him for his selfish wordless act. But how could Rome be so sure that they would find a solution for this mess he caused? His big brother was so confident and he made Seth believe that they could work it out. They climbed out of the rental and walked to the entrance of the hospital to get as close as possible to their injured brother.

 **So readers I hope you liked it. Let me know what you think. I guess there will be a few more chapters. The boys will get to know a little more about Dean's past. Sorry it took me so long to update.**

 **Talk to you soon.**

 **Hugs to you all. Tixx**


	17. Chapter 17 Fears and pain of young souls

**Disclaimer: Look at the chapters ahead. I don't own anything and I have no clue what I am doing. This is just for fun and fans.**

 **What can I say . . . I am so sorry but life got in the way. I didn't forget the story at all. It is my baby and I have so many ideas for more stories but I literally have no time to type it up. But whatever I try to be better.**

 **Enjoy!**

Chapter 17

Fears and pain of young souls

Roman and Seth stepped up to the reception desk right at the entrance of the hospital. They wanted to ask where the ER was, so they could find Dean. But before the young Samoan got a chance to ask the elder woman at the desk, both men heard it. A bloodcurdling scream which was followed by inarticulate words. Then again screams and grunts. Over and over! Seth froze right next to his big brother who was curling one hand in a tight fist and the other arm found his way around Thie's shoulders. The two long-haired men followed that heartbreaking noises because they knew who made them. The lady behind the desk tried to stop them. "Gentlemen, please! Only close family and medical staff are allowed in the examining room. So will you please take a seat over there?"

Unimpressed by her words Roman put an arm around Seth to steady him and moved to the door where the noises came from which let his blood running cold.

"Sir. . . "

The tall Samoan glared at the lady with a look that said it all. _'Don't you dare and try to stop me. I am not gonna back down.'_

The nurse was about to call the security when the shorter of the two men started to speak. "Ma'am, please, you got to let us go. We are the only family that loves him and the only ones that want the best for him. We are brothers even if we are from different mothers. So please!" The architects mind was working his magic and his beautiful brown puppy eyes were doing the rest. The nurse was melting at those sweet words. But at the moment when she wanted to give her go another nurse from the examining room came and called her. "Shelly, call Dr. Weaver. As far as I know he's in his office." But that wasn't all she said. "The new patient had this written on his insurance card as a hint in case of difficulties. It said you just have to mention DA. The note says the doc will know what it means. He is really freaking out. We had to strap him to the bed." The elderly nurse walked back behind the desk to take the phone and call the aforesaid doc.

Seth and Roman looked at each other, they felt it in their guts. This couldn't be happening.

"If this man you are talking about is our friend, then please, you have to get the straps off him. He will fight them till he can't move anymore. Please!"

The tall and intimidating looking man yelled. The two-tuned beauty was beyond terrified. That was so wrong. He was losing his mind which tried to work 100mph. Seth got overwhelmed from his feelings. And now he was close to a mental break down. The young grabbed the shirt of his beloved big brother and whimpered. "Please no, no, no . . . Roman make it right again. Make it stop! It hurts, please!" Roman knew that certain feeling that counted as much for his brother as for himself. The long-haired Samoan pulled him close and petted his little brother's head. Now the tall young man pushed his best friend through the door to see for himself. As they both walked into the ER, they stopped in their tracks and couldn't move anymore. Dean was strapped by his hands, feet and on the mid-section of his body. And even though he was barely conscious, Dean was fighting these straps like his life was depending on it. The man with the unruly hair already had angry red marks on his wrists.

"Get off me. Let me out of this bed! Let me . . . Stop . . . Stop it!" His eyes turned into dull looking mirrors. "Please no . . . no! Let him be. Take me. But please don't hurt him anymore."

The lunatic screamed, trying to reach for an imaginary person. His hands made grapy motions and then. ". . . No STOP. Don't touch him, do you hear me. Stop IT, please Max stop! Do what you want with me. But please let him be!" Dean's raspy voice died in a desperate grunt but he was still fighting his confines. His two best friends were stunned that Dean was still able to move. How could he still have so much strength left in him after the last couple of days and not to forget his injuries?

Two of the male nurses wouldn't let the two worried men get close to their beloved and writhing in pain brother. Rage was boiling in Roman and Seth was furious. How could they let Dean hurt himself when they were supposed to help him to get better? "Get the straps of him, now!" Roman yelled and tried to push the nurses out of his way. But all the tension left the room when a planting voice call with a lot of authority and gentleness in his tune. "Dean Jonathan Ambrose! Calm down!"

Dean's body stopped moving in an instant and he let out a shaky breath. "D-D-Doc?" The wild spirit called in a tired and kind of raw voice. Seth winced as he heard that because he knew his lunatic was in so much pain. His big-big brother shook off the man who was still holding him in place and pulled his two-tuned weasel to comfort him.

"Doc, it hurts? He is not allowed to touch me! Get him off me. Doc it hurts! Where is Dylan? Where did you hide Dyl? Dyl? Hurts . . . huuuuurts!" His breathing hitched and he grabbed the sheets so hard that his knuckles turned white. The doc who Dean seemed to know really well moved closer but not to close then he also knew Dean. "Dean, can you hear me? Give me an answer somehow. There is no reason to be so worked up. You know that I won't let Max come near you. I want to make it better!" The doc was taking his time and this angered the two tall man. The man with the white coat looked at them like an angry father would look at his misbehaving child and that was the reason why they tried to calm down. After that short encounter the doc focused back on his long-stay patient. And all of a sudden Dean took in a deep sharp breath and nodded. "Can hear, don't wanna though." The man in the white coat and the black and white marbled hair smirked. "Good Dean, very good! You know the drill to get the straps removed. Do you remember?"

Dr. Weaver placed his hand on top of his unruly and waited. The lunatic was still fighting the bounds on his body. His breathing was wrecked while Rome and Seth couldn't take it anymore. The pretty man with the bi-colored hair was about to say something when he heard Dean taking a deep breath.

"Have . . . to . . . calm . . . down!" The blonde whispered with tears rolling down his face while his hands were grapping the sheets real hard. The chest of the young man was rising and falling like he just finished a sprint race with the world record. But the blue-eyed man tried so hard not to fight the restrains the held him down or better said pulled him back into the painful and dark memories of his secretly past.

The doc silent both of the standing man with a finger to his lips. "That's good Dean. Proud of you. Keep breathing slowly. I am going to open the first strap. You keep concentrating on your breathing, okay buddy!" The security wanted to stop Dr. Weaver but he told them in a stern voice to leave. "Dean, I'll open the one on your stomach. How are you feeling?" The doc pulled gently on the strap and you could see Dean relaxing in the same second.

His two brothers didn't understand how could this 'stranger' calm down the wild card with simple touches and soothing words. "Doc . . . want . . . to . . . sleep. Just sleep the fucking pain away. Please."

Meanwhile the doc had removed the straps on his legs and Dean pulled them close to his chest. He wanted to turn to his side but he couldn't. "Dean, you need to calm down a bit more before I can give you something! So keep breathing slow. Is there anything else I can do to help you relax?"

Dean was rolling to the side because he knew the drill. One strap would stay on until they were sure he was calm enough for reasonable thoughts. The lunatic took still deep and hallow breaths. But he couldn't do it. He just couldn't get it out of his head. The pain! The darkness! The agony!

With his free hand he grasped his unruly hair and pulled really hard. The middle aged doc tried to remove Dean's hand when he and the two standing men heard it. A soundless whisper.

"Rome. Thie . . . please. Don't leave!" Within a split of a second they were on both side of his bed and snuggled up to him. "Dee, we would never!" Roman whispered in a stern voice right next to Dean's ear. His voice was laced with authority and concern like only a big caring brother would sound. Seth couldn't speak he was to shook up. He just pressed himself carefully in Dean's side and nuzzled his face in Dee's neck. The young Samoan wrapped both of his strong arms around his brothers and pulled them close. Dr. Weaver watched in awe that the impressive young man, whom he knew since he was an eleven years old boy, press his face into the side of the really tall young man with intimidating and caring eyes.

The doc knew who these two young men were. You might wonder why but Dean still showed up at his office once a month. He needed this to cope, to accept, to go on and to live with no regrets.

And just as all three of them thought the troubled soul had fallen asleep his body tensed and his breathing picked up again. All of a sudden the blue-eyed man leached out and Dr. Weaver couldn't do a thing because it happened without the usually warning signs.

"No . . . No . . . No . . . Leave . . ." Dean yelled in a frantic voice and wide open eyes. "Leave us alone . . ." Dr. Weaver knew what to do but first he had to get Roman and Seth away from the blonde. Out of reach so there would be as little damage as possible.

Dean pushed hard at Romans chest and with a sudden move of his hips he send Seth flying out of the bed. The architect was able to catch himself so he landed on his hands and knees on the floor next to the bed. The grey-eyed man wasn't so lucky. The push of his brother's hands made him fall backwards with his head bumping in the side table at the bed. Dr. Weaver was pulling Seth to his feet so they could help Roman back in a standing position. The doc checked the Samoan's head for cuts but at least he didn't have to worry about treating him to. The only thing he found was a developing but that would give him some uncomfortable nights of sleep. Nothing major for a tough guy like Dean always attributes him. "I need you to leave or stand back and not interfere at any moment. What I have to do to bring him back to reality is not a walk through the park. He has to remember things he would love to forget but it is the only thing that works when he is this far gone. I promise I will explain everything to you. Because even I never met you I know you two are the men he calls his family. He gave me permission to tell you but I first want to grand his wish for a peaceful sleep. I won't question your decision if you want to leave or stay. But I need to be sure that you let me do my job and help him. Even if it won't look like I am doing a good job. Believe me I am the one who knows him best. So Roman, Seth . . . stay or leave? What will it be?"

 **Dear readers I hope you enjoyed this chappy. Let me know what you think. I will update way sooner than the last time this is a promise. If one of you has a request for a one shot hit me. I will do one or two to make it up to you.**

 **Love and hugs to you.**

 **Tixx**


	18. Chapter 18 Bloody and painful memories

**Just to make myself clear again … I own nothing. This is all just stuck in my head!**

 **Hey Lovelys**

 **I got the next chappy for you! I think I didn't take that much this time! I hope you will enjoy. I also started the next one already. :-P**

 **Let me know what you think!**

 **Hugs to you all and now dive in.**

 **Tixx**

 **Chapter 18 Bloody and painful memories**

The doc gave instructions to both long-haired men to stay away from the bed to let him work. And then he stepped close to the still tossing Dean and gripped both of his wrists in a tight hold. "Dean, stop! Now! He is not here. You know he is not and that he never again will be. Remember Dean. Come on, Dean, you know it!" The troubled young men stopped trashing and closed his pretty blue eyes and tried to fight the bad memories.

"Come on, buddy, I know it hurts but you have to come back to reality. Max is not allowed here and I will never ever let him touch you again. You know that. I'm sorry, Dean. Come on get a grip."

Dean's breath hitched and he went stiff. "D-Dylan . . . " A strangled cry escaped him and the doc loosened the grip to whip away the tears!

"Dyl . . . is . . . dead! Maxwell . . . I was hurt . . . but Dylan . . . I didn't . . . protect him." Doctor Weaver gripped Dean's face with both hands and said in an all so gentle voice like he was talking to a little kid. A scared small little boy. This was what Roman and Seth thought as they saw they brother fighting with himself and his memories. The both didn't dare to move. It was kind of surreal. The doc was only talking him through this all but it looked worse than one of the dead-matches Dean used to do. All the pain in the wildcards face and the tiring effort to calm him down from the doc was cruel to watch.

"Dean, we went through this already. This was not your fault. None of it. Come on, you know there was nothing you could have done. Why is that so?" Dean tried to hide his face in the pillow and his free hand. But the doc didn't let him. "Why Dean?" The young man opened his eyes and looked his doc who became his friend straight in the eyes. He tried to stop the tears but he was unsuccessful.

"Because . . . cause I was only 11 years old and he was a sick bastard. We didn't do anything to deserve what he had done to us." Tears left his eyes like waterfalls but he never faltered in telling the truth. Dean took the hand of the docs arm and whispered! "Thanks for pulling me back. I should have told you or Rome or Seth. So I wouldn't have to be by myself with the bloody, painful memories of my past."

"That's true, Dean. How about some sleep now. We can talk later! What do think about that?"

The blonde turned to his left side and so his back to his brothers who were holding on to each other so they wouldn't break the rule of not interfering. Neither of them had seen him so vulnerable and guilty.

Doctor Weaver left the room to get the meds for Dean. He knew him so well and was sure that a good, deep and dreamless sleep was what Dean wanted and needed. As the doc came back with a little injection he focused for the first time in the last 15 minutes on the other two men in the room.

"How are you two holding up? I know it is a lot to take in. Let him fall asleep and I will explain."

All Roman and Seth could do was nod. Seth wanted to touch Dean to reassure him, to let him know that he wasn't alone. But before he could the doc stopped him. "Please, Seth not now. He would not tolerate that at the moment. Believe me! I will explain all to you two but first he needs to rest."

All of a sudden Dean's breathing picked up, he grasped and looked for the hand of the man who knows all of it. Everything! "Doc . . . mum . . . she is gone. And . . . M-Max . . . he . . ." The physician took his arm in a firm grip so he could insert the injection. "Dean . . . He won't be allowed to be near you. I won't let him. So stay calm, you doing a good job. Do you want to sleep now? Dean nodded but looked with fear in his pretty blue eyes over to his brother and the man he loved. "Sorry . . . . .that! I couldn't be brave enough to tell you. So . . . sorrr . . .!" Sleep grabbed hold of Dean before he could finish his sentence. The doc petted his head until he was fast asleep. The young Samoan and the man from Iowa who leaned against his big brother watched the scene with eyes wide open. Not believing what they just heard. Why would their wild card apologize if there was nothing he should be sorry for?

"Why don't we let him sleep and go to my office and I'll explain everything in a more quite place?"

The doc saw the confusion and the pain in the eyes of both long-haired men. Roman nodded weakly the confusion and the exhaustion took his toll on him. But Seth looked back and forth between the two people he loved the most. Roman-Dean-Roman-Dean-Roman. Roman-Dean-Roman-Dean-Dean-Roman-Dean-Dean. His eyes would fall more often on Dean and at last just stay there.

"Sethie, - Thie – come on. We need a break. I am pretty sure the doc will be done with his explanation before he will wake up. We won't let him wake up alone. I promise and the doc will too. Right, Dr. Weaver?" The doc saw that Roman and Seth especially were torn to leave him alone and he was thankful that his young friend found these to caring people.

"Of course. We can turn on the CCTV in my office just in case he starts to stir before I am finished with the explanation. What do you think about that, Seth?"

 **I know it is short but I am getting to the center of it. I promise next chappy Dean's painful past will be revealed. Stay tuned!**

 **I just want to let you know that I am also working on some of the request they will be up very soon!**

 **Hugs to all of you, stay crazy and love your life!**

 **Tixx**


	19. Chapter 19 Heartbreaking

**Disclaimer: I don't own anything except my imagination.**

 **Warning speaking of child abuse might trigger!**

 **So lovely's … here it is the next one. It turned out a bit long but I didn't want to cut Dean's story. Today I have to put out a warning some of the sections are very graphic and might trigger. Rated M for violence and abuse. I don't want to hurt anybody so I put the passages in between *stars*. I reveal the dark past of Dean and it got to me sometimes. I hope you not getting mad at me. I apologize for the slow update but I am working fulltime.**

 **Hugs to you**

 **Chapter 19 Heartbreaking**

So the three men went to the office of Dr. Weaver. But as they were about to pass the door Roman stopped in his track and looked at the sign at the door.

 _Dr. Eric Weaver, M.D._

 _Pediatric psychiatrist_

 _Trauma specialist_

"Is this what you are? Are you a shrink for kids?" Seth asked as he saw what Roman was looking at.

"Seth . . . don't say that it is inappropriate. And I think Dean wouldn't want you to either!" Both of their heads flipped around to the direction where they heard the doc chuckling. "But that is exactly what he calls me. On the other hand is Dean very grateful and supportive of me. He donates every year half a fortune to my research team. Even though I told him that it was more than enough that he gave me permission to use his files in class or at congresses." Both men were shocked to see the doc going from amused to serious. The doc went over to the monitor, switched on and changed to the right channel. Dr. Weaver turned the monitor a bit and motioned to the two men who were still standing in the door of his office to sit on the couch. Roman walked over to the couch not without checking the monitor so he would notice any changes. Seth walked right up to the CCTV – monitor and put his hand on Dean's sleeping figure. "Thie, come here so we can get some information. I want to be by his side just as much as you. But maybe we can understand him better when we know the rest of his past. So come on, sit your cute butt down and let's listen." The young two-tuned man nodded and walked over to his big brother. Before he turned to the doc could start talking. Doctor Weaver got a very thick file out. Roman and Seth could see that Dean's name was written on there and a date that looked kind of familiar. But they couldn't figure it out. The doc took a look at the CCTV monitor and signed. "It is so good to see him generally happy. It was a hard way and a lot of effort for him to come this far. I still remember the first time I met him and I will probably never forget that sight." The middle-aged man opened the file and pulled out a wrinkled picture. "I need to be sure that you want to know everything that made Dean the person he is. It is not a fairytale it is more like a mental thriller or a horror movie. He gave me permission to tell you two if I think you are sure. I know that it would explain a lot about him and his behavior but like I said I need to be sure." The doc put the pic upside-down on the table where they were all sitting and got up with the question. "What can I get you to drink? This takes a while if we start. Think a minute about it." The brown-eyed man leaned over to his big brother and whispered something in his ear. The tall Samoan petted the head of the two-tuned man and turned to Dr. Weaver. "We would like some tea if it is not too much effort?" The tall Samoan put his arm around his shaking little brother. "And Seth wanted to know how do you figure out if we are sure? I think he got a point did Dean give you a speech how we behave when we are uncertain? Or brings your profession that knowledge with it?!" Roman got a bit angry why did the doc need to do the explaining, why couldn't Dean do it himself? It was so unlike their wildcard this didn't make sense to the man who loved his little brothers and there wouldn't and couldn't be a thing in the world that would change that. "Mr. Reigns it looks to me like you're upset about something. Can you tell me why that is?" Seth looked up from the cup of tea that the middle-aged man had placed in front of them. "Yeah, Romie you look pissed. Are you angry with me? Or with him?" His brown eyes were open wide and Roman could see the Thie was close to losing the fight against the tears. He pulled the too-smart-for-his-own-good in his arms and said to him and the doc in a serious voice. "Thie, I am not angry with you or him. It is more like I am confused. Why would Dean tell someone else to explain to us the real truth about how he ended up in foster care? Why would he let someone else in when he has so much trouble telling people something about his past? I just don't understand. But maybe the doc can answer these questions before we start? Doesn't this bother you at all, Sethie?" The brown-eyed man nodded and looked with big puppy dog eyes to the doc. Also, Roman, had his eyes glued to the doc too. "I can do that but first of all, I need to make sure I got the right two people. I mean I don't doubt that you are the two men he calls brothers and who are his emergency contacts." Both long-haired men took a deep breath and looked first at each other and then to the man who just shook their world. Seth found his voice back first and asked with confusion in this voice. "We are what? His emergency contacts. We both are? How can that be possible?" The Doc took a sip of his tea and looked these young men in the eyes and he thought. _'Still too young to understand the power of real friendship, trust and unconditional love.'_ He pulled out the first page of the thick file and put on the table so the man who he thought of as his own son called brothers could see for themselves. "Because Dean only trust, 100% trusts four adults in this world. I say adults because he keeps tells me that he trusts a little girl but that it is different. The little girl is your daughter Mr. Reigns. The first time he was supposed to be babysitting he had a little breakdown. That was when he asked me if he was capable of taking care of her. I don't remember how old the little princess was back then but he was terrified. He thought his history would repeat itself. The advice I gave him was to share the responsibility if it was scaring him so much. And he told me he asked one of his best friends to babysit with him. Back then I didn't know your names or anything but I was glad that he found you. I always wished that he would find true friendship." Both men stared at Dr. Weaver they didn't believe what they were hearing. "Dean, he is not afraid to have kids around him. He always makes the kids laugh and Leila adores him. She falls instantly in a good calm mood because Dean is always calm around kids." The doc nodded and wrote something on an empty piece of paper. "This is now Thie, remember! I remember the day I asked him to watch Leila for a couple hours so I can have a nice dinner for our anniversary. He kept saying. 'I can't, I can't protect her. I screwed up before. I can't. I want to but I don't think I am able to.' I kind of had to talk him into it. I saw how he was handling kids and how he was playing with Leila on BBQ-nights. I knew he could and I didn't understand his concerns. And I was so happy when he said he would do it if I was okay with you being there too." Seth was not sure if he even remembered that being so dramatic. In his eyes Dean just asked him so he didn't need to be alone after he put Leila to bed. Maybe he was wrong and there was more to it.

The doc took the slip with the emergency contacts and said. "I am pretty convinced that you are sure gentlemen. But I have to follow the rules. So, first of all, I need to check your identity. So you are Seth Daniel Rollins, is this correct?" The doc waited for Seth to nod which he did and went on. "And you are Roman Leati Reigns, am I right?" Again he waited for the confirmation which Roman granted quickly. "Okay. You know Dean Jonathan Ambrose for about 4 years. More or less. Is this true? And you three are working together in the same wrestling company. Is this also correct?" The young men with the long hair nodded. This was all basic stuff everyone could google that except their second names. Because they asked the company not to release them. Roman and Seth didn't even know that Dean's was Jonathan. All they knew was that it started with a J. The doc put pen and the paper with the contacts in front of them. "If you are sure, please sign this but you need to know that what you will hear will be very graphic, violent and is full of abuse and anxiety. So if you think you can't handle that then we shouldn't start." Roman grabbed that paper first and said in a stern voice. "If it means I can understand and help one of my best friends then I will get through this." With these words, he signed the paper and looked at Seth. "Dean would do the same thing for us. No matter how much it might hurt him. I want to know and maybe we understand what made him tick like he does. We don't want to change him. We love him and we want him to believe us." The two-tune signed the paper also and took a sip of his tea.

"But Dr. Weaver you said a couple minutes ago Dean trusts four adults! I assume you are one of them, Roman and I are two more but that only equals three. Who is the fourth person?" The tall Samoan was thankful for the functional brain of his little brother. He wanted to ask that too but it is already a lot to take in and they not even started the real thing. "The fourth person is a woman and it is your wife Mr. Reigns if I remember correctly her name is Lisa. Dean says that he would do anything for her because she brings out the best of you and she makes you happy." Now not just Roman was fighting tears even Seth had glassy eyes because that was the cutest thing they had ever heard and it was true. Seth and Dean always envied Roman for the way Lis would look at him. They really loved each other. "So I think we are good to go now."

Dr. Weaver got more tea for all of them and on his way to sit back down he opened a drawer on his desk to grab a framed picture. As Roman and Seth saw the pic of the two boys the breaths got stuck in their throats. Those piercing blue eyes, those sweet dimples on both boys. The pic showed the two young boys at the age around 9 or 10. The boys had a curly blond-reddish chaos as hairs on top of their heads. The boy on the left in the pic had his arm around the shoulders of the others and looked at the camera with mischievous glint hiding in his eyes. The doc fond glance at the pic told Seth and Roman that he really cared for Dean. "Dean is the only adult patient who I am still counseling. I tried to send him to a colleague but it didn't work and we agreed that I would do it as long as he needs it. Lately, he was here more often than the years before. And I guess that it has something to do with happened at work and the death of his mom. It is too much. But let me start with the pic you looking at. This is Dean's favorite picture of him and Dylan." Both long-haired men looked briefly at each other and then with questioning eyes at Dr. Weaver.

"Oh, I guess he didn't tell you that he had an identical twin. Can you guess which one is Dean and who is Dylan? I bet you get it wrong!" the smile of the doc was challenging.

The young Samoan took a closer look and so did Seth. Both smiled at each other and pointed to the boy on the left side in the picture. The doc's eyes grew as big as a plate! "How did you know? You two are the first people I met who got it right on the first try. How?" Seth smiled and started to fondle over the pic and began talking. "When Dee smiles his left eyebrow rises up just a tiny bit and he usually . . . " Roman grabbed his hand to stop him because he saw that the eyes of his baby brother were glued to the screen that showed Dean sleeping. It was hard for Seth to keep it together. "Usually he sticks his tongue out at one point or the other." The Samoan said in a deep emotion-filled voice. The tall man pulled the Iowan beauty to his chest and patted his head because Thie couldn't hold back his tears. "It is so nice to finally meet the two of you." Dr. Weaver announced in a quiet voice. "After he met you for the first time he was so scared. Because your choice of support requires trust. Trust in yourself, with your partners and your co-workers. And as WWE decided to put the three of you in a team he called me every other day. Usually, he told me stuff about you and your families. But it helped to get his anxieties under control. I had to assure him that he is worth the happiness he feels when he is with you two! It took us, me and him, years to fix what the event that led to Dylan's death broke in him." The doc filled up all of the teacups and looked over to the CCTV monitor to check on Dean. "I am still the only person he can talk about all these things. He never told anyone else because it literally lets him break down in every way, physically and emotionally. And he can be quite stubborn."

The long-haired men looked at each other and moved closer together. Would it be enough to prepare them for the inevitable? Would it be enough to feel the presence of the other close by? They wanted to hear Dee's story. Both men wanted to know, understand and help their brother get better. So they looked at Dr. Weaver with confidence in his warm brown eyes. "Dr. Weaver?" Seth asked in a quiet voice. "How long do you know Dean and why?" he wanted to show the physician that they were sure. That they would pull through. That they would do anything for Dean, their friend, their lunatic, their wildcard their brother and his everything.

The doc moved in his chair to a comfortable position and took a deep breath while holding the framed picture of Dylan and Dean in his hand.

*** **(A/N This is where the bad things start)**

"I want you to trust me. I will show you the first footage of Dean the investigating officer send me. It was 2 hours after the tragedy. We will use the monitor and I swear Dean won't wake up for another couple hours and the footage is only about 2 or 3 minutes long." He looked at the two men Dean considered his family. The two-tuned-hair man nodded and Roman added: "Dean trusts you so who are we to deny the favor." The doc pulled out the remote, changed the channel on the monitor. The first thing that appeared was a blue screen with a date and time stamp in the right top corner. All of a sudden you could hear a child screaming like bloody murder "Noooo, don't touch us! Let us alone!" Then a scene more likely to be found in a horror movie could be seen. A boy sitting in the far corner of the room, back pressed into the wall behind him. His head was covered in bruises and blood. Cuts in his lips and eyebrows, a huge gap in his head that turned his auburn hair in a dark mess. His upper body was bare-chested but you could be fooled on one side it looked like he was wearing a dark blue/greenish tank. New bruises mended into older ones. Small cuts and marks which looked like they were made by a belt or a whip. The boy was very thin and he didn't only look like he was in pain. You could also see that the exhaustion took residents in his bones. The boy was more than tired, he was tired of being tired. And on top of all of that his piercing blue eyes were filled with tears, angry tears, fury tears, stubborn tears, sad tears and guilty tears. The eyes of the young boy looked way older and mature than his body. His two thin arms clutched something close and tight to his body and he whispered. "It's okay Dyl. It's going to be okay. I won't let him hurt you ever again. His eyes shot back up as he noticed a movement of a female officer tried to get closer to him and his bundled up treasure. His eyes stared in her direction. "Don't! Don't come closer." These blue eyes of the boy that couldn't be older than 10 or 11 were throwing death glares. The cameraman zoomed out of the boy one of a kind seen-to-much-for-my-age-eyes to get his whole appearance in the frame. That was when you could see he was holding another body to his chest, pulling him as close as possible to his own. The other body who looked just like another little boy wasn't moving. He also had already starting to dry blood sticking to his head. The pants of the boy holding him were stained with drying blood as well. The arms and legs of the held boy were limp and you could also see big bruises all over his body. Again an officer tried to talk to the sitting boy to tell him he wanted to check on the boy in his arms. Even though you could see the boy got weaker by minute he fought off every attempt by anybody to take his treasure from him. You didn't have to be a pro to see that boy who was sitting was holding a dead body to his chest. The sitting child kept talking to his dead brother this much the investigators knew. On the screen was now added: Ambrose Twins, 11 years.

*** **(End part 1)**

A couple seconds later a young cop appeared on the screen and he started talking. "Eric, I need your help. These are the Ambrose twins, looks like long abuse by the stepfather and the mother said she was too scared to interfere. She told us the sitting boy is Dean and the one he is holding is Dylan. But not even she could convince him to let go of him. Can you help me? When you are looking at this we are already trying for 3 hours to get them to a hospital. I'm not a doc but I think it's too late for Dylan. So, please if you can help me I don't want to make it worse for the boy." You saw that the cop had trouble to keep it together and then the screen turned blue again. Dr. Weaver pointed the remote at the monitor and changed it back to the channel that showed adult Dean peacefully sleeping in his hospital bed.

The scenes were so different that Roman and Seth couldn't believe it. How was it possible that this bloody, scared to death little boy holding on to a corps for dear life was their funny, wild and lovable lunatic.

"That has to be a joke. Never ever, this did not happen to Dee. He . . . " Seth's voice cracked and he put his head on Roman's shoulder. "Dr. Weaver, when was this? Dean can't be older than 10 years old in this footage! How did it come to this? And who did this to him. I am going to kill him. If you hurt one of my brothers I will hurt you!" The Samoan balled one of his hands into a fist so tight that his knuckles turned white. "Romie, no you can't leave us. And if you do something like this another brother will leave him. I have a hard time to fix what I did to him but if you would leave he would be broken beyond repair. So please, big brother, please don't leave him and don't leave me."

"Hey, hey hold your horses there, my friends! The man who did this to Dylan and Dean served his time in jail even if it wasn't enough or even a fair deal. I will never let him get close to Dean ever again. That sadistic asshole who got off when he could dominate and overpower his victim. You probably agree that I rather remember young Dean this way than the first ever impression I got to see him." The doc pointed first to the framed pic of the smiling twins and then to the monitor. "As you can guess I dropped everything I was working on and drove to the crime scene. I saw a lot of cops, medics, social service, a handcuffed man with black hair and fury eyes, a woman who liked like she had nothing to do with the whole drama and my friend. He was the officer working this case. He was so stressed out I saw it from a mile away. The closer I got to the house the more I understood why. I could hear again a broken voice scream to leave him and his brother be. That nobody should touch them. My friend saw me coming closer and relief washed over his pained face. The first thing I told him was to tell the bunch of people to leave the room Dean was in. I explained to him that it was stressing him out. To make it easier for him it would be better if there were only 3 to 4 people in the room. The solution we found was the lady from the social service, Mrs. Hollis, my cop buddy Camren and myself. I introduced everyone to Dean. He looked at Mrs. Hollis like he has seen her before but he didn't say anything. A couple years later he told me that his school reported him and Dylan because they always had bruises and cuts. He told me that was the time when he lost faith in humanity. But I don't want to change the subject. It took me two hours to get him in an ambulance even though he didn't let go of his brother. He placed him carefully on the stretcher and held his hand. I sat with him while we drove to the hospital. One of the medic's in the car started to take care of Dean's wounds he flinched at every touch. But he was wondering why nobody took a look at Dylan. That was the first time his blue sapphires took me hostage for the first time full force. " The doc was taken aback by the memories of an eleven-year-old boy who looked like he survives hell. Dr. Weaver never met another man like Dean. He had to learn from a young age that pain is temporary and he tried to explain to Dean, while he was in FCW because he thought he was not worth anything other, that his childhood was far from normal. "Dr. Weaver is everything okay?" The question asked by the two-tuned man brought him back to the here and now. He realized that the tears started to run down his face, just like it always happened when he talked about Dean's story in such emotional detail. Seth starred with big eyes at him and the young Samoan tried to hide his anger and the fact that he realized they know nothing about all of this. "H-how long had Dee to live with that terrible man?" Roman's quiet question took Seth by surprise but he wanted to know too. "I just asked because I studied some psychology at Georgia Tech. And I know that the damage can increase the amount of time you have to face your tormentor." Seth looked surprised at Roman and Eric raised an eyebrow. "Romie, I didn't know that you studied psychology. I thought you studied economy and sports." His big brother looked always adorable when he thought he did something to be ashamed of. Both Dean and he thought it was just too damn cute. "It was just a minor subject and I only took the class for 4 semesters." That was the quiet answer Roman gave his little brother and the doctor. Seth couldn't understand why Roman would think it was a bad thing to study something like psychology. So he moved closer and hugged him real tight. "Romie that is so cool. Maybe I should take some psychology classes. So we can talk about that stuff. Don't be ashamed." The young Samoan smiled at his little brother who had no idea how many times his dad told it is a wasted energy to study something like psychology. He was so grateful that he found his brothers because they let him be the person he was just like Lis.

The doc cleared his trough to get the attention of the two young man. "Mr. Reigns, I think Mr. Rollins is right there is nothing to be ashamed of. But if it is okay I would give you an answer to your question." The physician looked at the two young men to figure out if he should tell them everything at once or if it would be too much. He took a deep breath and said in an emotional stained voice. "Dylan and Dean's mother met Maxwell when the boys were only 5 years old. They both went through hell. It started a year after he moved in with them. He started to physically punish the boys for little mistakes and it got worse and worse. It started to be a slap on the butt or on the cheek as Dean would say it. After a while Mr. Asshole figured out that Dylan was very sensitive and he enjoyed to insult him and make him cry. On the other hand he learned that Dean would do everything to protect his 'little' brother. He would beg him not to let it out on Dylan because Dylan didn't take the beatings very well he became depressed. When Dean ask me if I know how hard it is to convince a 9 year old not to commit suicide, I was shocked. I understood in this moment that he was beyond a traumatized child. He was broken and self-distracted because after Dylan's death he lost his whole world the reason for him to survive so his brother could live too.

*** **(Part 2)**

Those six years with Max took his toll on Dean and Dylan's body and on their souls. The slaps turned into punches the punches to whips with a belt and then to beatings that involved sometimes all of the above. Max insulted Dylan usually with slaps and words until he cried at the same time he let dean beg him to stop it on his knees. And then he would send the crying boy to his bedroom and took his time with Dean. Dean told me once Max's favorite thing to do was to hit him with his belt until he would bleed. Before the trail for Maxwell started I was assigned to talk to him and work out a profile for him. It disgusted me so much to listen to his bullshit. He said it was like a redemption for him. His soul supposedly found peace in the thing he did to the twins. He also told me after the worse beatings Dean would take he got really horny and would whack off to spill his seed on the barely conscious body of the brave child. And then he would have the best sex with Dean's mother. I asked him if he ever took Dean and Dylan to a doctor for treating the wounds he said only a few times when he got carried away usually the twins would treat their wounds by themselves. As I asked him what he meant with getting carried away. His answer almost made me puke. I never met a more sadistic person then him. He said when he was really euphoric and proud of how much Dean would take to protect his brother he forgot sometimes that he is only a child. He broke him once some rips and the other time an arm. He said when this is all over he can't wait to get his hands back on Dean that was when I told him he will never see Dean again I will make sure of it. In this moment he tried to attack me and I was so thankful for that Eric, my police buddy, was with us in the room. They brought him back to jail and the trail was solid but the 10 years for bodily injury and bodily injury with death consequences was not enough me. So I filed a restraining order so he would never come close to Dean ever again. After the trail I took Dean on a camping trip with my wife and my daughters. I wanted to convince him to agree to foster care I didn't want him to be forced. It took me a couple sessions to get him there. But he had a condition I had to agree that I would let him tell and show me everything what Max did to Dylan and him. I was confused about the show and tell saying and if I would have known what I have to endure . . . No I would have done it anyway because he deserves to be happy more than anybody else. Max sometimes would tape what he did to the twins and Dean hid all of those 45 tapes before the police came to look for evidence. I mean they found enough to put him behind bars but the tapes maybe they had send him for more than 10 years. I don't know." Roman and Seth looked at each other not knowing what to do. There was this question burning in the back of their brains but were they ready to know the truth. How would they survive if this bastard also took this from Dean? It was easy they didn't want to know. If it was true there was no way that Max would get out of this unharmed? Seth was too scared to ask the doc the question so he looked help seeking at his big brother. So Roman was the brave one who asked Dr. Weaver the burning question. "Doc, did Dean ever say if Max . . . did . . . he . . . arrrg . . . this is really hard! **(Deep breath)** Did Max rape, Dean? Please tell us. We need to know! Was he raped by this asshole?"

 **So this is everybody this is it. I know it is a long chapter but I didn't want to cut it in two. I want to thank you for your reviews and commies. Keep it up that way it's like candy. :-***

 **Hugs to you all.**

 **Tixx**


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